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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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I have a problem! - July 31st 2017, 02:06 AM

I don't know what to do. I have a problem with food, so I don't eat all of my food when we are having dinner together as a family, my sister is always yelling at me to eat more and then my mom will tell me to eat more. Then when my mom and dad and sister get up from the table I throw my food away in the trash and act like I ate the food. I don't know what is wrong with me, I will eat breakfast and lunch, but why can't I eat all of my dinner? Is something wrong with me? I don't get it. Can someone please help me with this?
   
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Re: I have a problem! - July 31st 2017, 09:39 PM

Do you know why you aren't eating? Are you not hungry? Are you afraid you will gain weight? Do you not like the food being served?

I used to skip Breakfast and Lunch a lot of the times. Sometimes it was due to my disordered eating habits and other times it was due to being busy. I would sleep in and wouldn't have time for breakfast and when lunch came around the school didn't always have the best options.

If you can try and figure out what is causing this you can work on figuring out how to improve the situation. If you are not eating because you don't want to gain weight than that would likely be a disordered eating behavior and you would want to look into therapy or something.

If there is a reason outside of gaining weight that you are doing this then it might not be disordered eating. Some people have difficulty eating because of nerves or because they are picky.

If you can supply a bit more information I might be able to give a better response.


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Re: I have a problem! - August 4th 2017, 09:14 PM

Yes sometimes I just can't eat the food, it's hard to eat it. Sometimes it takes me a while to finish breakfast or dinner. Yes I am afraid to gain weight. I even have a hard time eating the food that I like. I don't know what is wrong with me, and my mom and sister are always yelling at me to eat more dinner. I just can't sometimes and I don't know what to do now.
   
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Re: I have a problem! - August 9th 2017, 11:21 AM

I had an issue with struggling to eat my dinner. I never really understood why. I was kind of scare to be gaining weight and I even like the food sometimes. But u know what I did? I sat there and I kept telling my self one more forkful. Even if you jut eat half of what's left it's better than nothing. Your mum and sister are probably yelling at you because they care for you and don't want to see you get hurt. My sister has her own issues and she thinks I hate her because I'm hard on her. I just want her to get better. Maybe also talk to your sister to get some of her advice. Sorry ifs advice is crap. Stay strong!
   
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Re: I have a problem! - August 11th 2017, 12:47 AM

Ok. Thank you so much.
   
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Re: I have a problem! - August 13th 2017, 07:20 PM

Is the fear of weight gain your main reason for not wanting to eat? Do you know what's exactly causing the issue, particularly with dinner, as opposed to other meals?


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Re: I have a problem! - August 13th 2017, 11:45 PM

No it's not just a fear of weight gain. It's other things too.
   
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Re: I have a problem! - August 15th 2017, 12:12 AM

What kind of other things? I'm just asking because it'll impact the advice I'll give.


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Re: I have a problem! - August 19th 2017, 09:23 AM

Having your mother and father and sister all yell at you certainly is counterproductive. That will stress you out, and stress is what triggers this problem. They're just making it worse!

It's the emotional midbrain that doesn't want to eat. The rational frontal cortex already knows you need to eat. But the fear comes from the midbrain.

The midbrain decides it doesn't want to eat, and you don't eat.

Oh, also, if you look at a diagram, notice the frontal cortex is on the top, and the spine which carries the nerves to the rest of the body which make the body move, and between the two is the midbrain! All decisions from the rational thinking frontal cortex have to go through the midbrain to reach the spine and the rest of the body! The emotional midbrain gets to review all instructions from the frontal cortex. You have to get the emotional midbrain on board to go along with this eating idea, because the midbrain can block any idea it doesn't like, and it can run off on it's own if it wants to do something else. If it doesn't want to eat, then your body isn't going to make the motions so you eat.

So one trick is to focus on how the midbrain is feeling, how are you feeling? The midbrain doesn't work on logic and rational thought, it runs on primitive emotions.

Focus on reducing stress, Explain to your parents they are just making it worse by stressing the midbrain. They need to take the opposite approach, and help calm you down, ease stress, make that emotional midbrain happy. Then it will be easier to eat. (Though eating disorders can still be a problem, this is one part of the solution.)

Best wishes!
   
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Re: I have a problem! - August 20th 2017, 02:39 AM

Thank you for your help, I get what you're saying.
   
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