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Eating Disorders If you or someone close to you is struggling with an eating disorder, reach out here to ask questions or to receive support for recovery.

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PurpleGinger Offline
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Hypocrite? - September 7th 2010, 10:06 PM

So, I used to be on here quite frequently a few years ago after a trauma and it helped a lot. I finally started dating again and its gone very bad (save from details). I council a lot of my friends on health, have taken classes, have taken people to the hospital and visited them there for all sorts of issues. I'm the person everyone looks up to and I don't feel like I can talk to them about this: I think I have an eating disorder.
I've never been thin, always [Edited] heavier than average but this was never a problem. I had other issues, but few with my weight. A few month ago a friends mom asked me if I was pregnant. I guess I had gained more but it crushed me.
I lost [Edited] fast in the next two months: worked out, ate breakfast and lunch and acted like I was doing so healthily. I wasn't. Its no surprise to me that eventually I caved and went on a huge binge that made me gain back all the weight and more.
Trying to get back on the right path I started again, trying to be healthy, I ate a good breakfast and lunch today and walked home from school (its the first day). On the way my friend joked as I told him about my weight fall and jump that I sounded like I have an eating disorder, and he's not the first one to say so.
I've done some research and I really believe this might be true. I lose sleep over thinking about losing my weight, feel guilty about it, I use pressure points for 'boredom hunger' more frequently than I'd like to admit and more.
I feel horrible, especially because I've counseled people on their own eating disorders and advised them to get help; I just feel like I can't. I feel like a fake and a hypocrite. I'm worried about my health, but I feel like I need to be better.

Last edited by eunoia; September 8th 2010 at 12:48 AM. Reason: Do not post weight figures anywhere on TeenHelp.
   
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aislina0 Offline
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Re: Hypocrite? - September 7th 2010, 11:55 PM

its not hypocritical, its not your fault. if you genuinely think you have an eating disorder you should speak to your doctor. don't feel bad for being a hypocrite, don't let that be the part that gets you down. focus on getting better <3
and good luck. if you ever want to message me i'm always here
   
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