loss of appetite

[x_sepi_x]

recently i was told ive got an eating disorder coz i don't to tend eat very much.. it started off where i just lost my appetite and i just couldn't get myself to eat, then after a few weeks of that my mind went into over-drive about my body image and my weight and then the not-eating just got worse to the point where i just would not eat at all unless i had to distract my mum from thinkin i don't eat. i count my calories ryt down to the last one and i always think of ways to burn them off while im eatin. i always tell my mum ive eaten durin the day when i haven't, it's just so easy to say 'i went to chip-shop mum' and just go upstairs and not go down for dinner.. now people are becomin more aware that i don't eat much and i keep tellin myself that ive got to eat and look after myself but i seem to have lost myappetite again, nothin seems appealing and i love the feelin of being hungry. i don't really like talking about this with my councellor so does anyone have any idea as to what i should do?

[emma01]

Well at least you can see you have got a problem which is a really good sign. You know very well that we need to eat to live, and you also know that if you need to hide anything from your mum, then its not a good thing! I really urge you to get help earlier on..as it really really sucks later on, and it is a lot harder to recover later on. Also, if you lose too much weight, you will be pushed to lose more and then it becomes harder to recover as seeing the changes is sometimes hard, or a hard thing to overcome.

[x_sepi_x]

i think thats kinda already happening, like peoples are tellin me ive lost weight and it says it on the scales too but in my head it's not enough, the more i lose the more i wanna lose on top of that... i dnt knowhow to stop myself from going down that road

[emma01]

Well to stop yourself you need to go see a doctor, they can monitor you and assure you that you dont need to lose weight, which I am sure that you dont. And you should start trying hard to eat normally again! People may tell you that when you start eating normally you gain weight, well i've gained nothing and my diet now is shocking! I mean sure I eat like fruit and veges and stuff, but like I can eat a WHOLE pineapple...lol I ate like 3 bags of grapes in just over a week! I also love ice cream and god 2 bowls of it last night! But hey I just have to enjoy it, it tastes lovely and you don't want to miss out on that! I have wasted a year of my life, and its still going as I actually need to gain weight now. I have no problem eating, but the fact that I have to gain so much is daunting and its very very hard. I love doing Zumba with my friends, its the aerobic dance fitness programme, now I dont do it to burn calories or get fit (neither do my friends) we do it for fun, but i have to tell the doctors I am not doing it as they don't allow me to do any exercise because I am so underweight!
I also have to get blood tests each week and I am weighed each week and have been since february this year. Its not fun at all I tell you. You are better off to just stay healthy!!! I have no problem with you trying to say get fit or even have a healthy lifestyle or even lose a few kgs, but dont do it in a way that you will regret. Do you really want to be known like I am "The crazy weirdo anorexic that starved herself"??? I dont think so!

[x_sepi_x]

i know what your saying but its just so hard for me to make myself eat. i can't stop myself from not-eating, its normal for me now.

[emma01]

Well if you could tell a parent or someone about this, they can help you and maybe feel better about yourself
Its also handy to try and understand what is making you not want to eat. For example, I am pretty sure the reason I stopped was because I am absolutely terrified and upset about growing up. I can't seem to be able to keep up with my friends, they seem to have all changed and become real teens, but I am still very young at heart and like to 'play' about with mum and I am not interested in boys/dating at all (im not lesbian, i just dont want to date anyone). I am not fashionable whatsoever and I hate the socials and formals at my school because I dont want to go out dancing.
So because I really think this was triggering me, and making me upset...so I got out my old videos and photos, and ever since I have been watching these videos, i've been happy and i've been eating because I have been watching them and thinking "i was so normal and happy back then, I can get back to that" If you get what I mean.
I also have bought foods that I used to eat when I was young, like chilli beans on corn chips (nachos) and also like pasta and also grilled wedges. The smell of it justs makes me happy as it reminds me of when I was young. I've also kept myself away from certain rice crackers, and even sweet chilli sauce and low fat sour cream...because that was all I ate when I was bad with my eating disorder, and those foods remind me of horrible times

I am not sure that doing this will help you, and also, it took me a year to think of what actually made me stop eating, and I really think its the stress of being a teenager, I felt so out of control and not sure what I was doing with myself, life as a child (3-12years old mainly) was absolutely amazing and so carefree, I knew exactly who I was and I was happy with myself. I was in control of my life and loved it!

[JacobFan1]

just try to eat somemore of . . . anything! see if that will help, force urself to eat!

[x_sepi_x]

its easier said than done, especially when other things make me more adamant not to eat