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Eating Disorders For questions about eating disorders or support for recovery, ask here.

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Katie Lydia Offline
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relapsed. - December 10th 2011, 02:06 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of eating disorders, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

If you read my last thread you'll see why i've relapsed along with my SHing, i've been abusing laxative suppositories, im taking two a day and i have lost a lot of weight but i hate myself at the same time, i want to be thin and show that arsehole that humiliated me that im fine and show him what he's missing! Since i've been doing this i've no longer been called wideload, fatty, manbeast and my personal favorite, the noise of a truck backing up. I still feel empty and angry. I know this is so wrong but what else am i supposed to do?!

Why is nothing filling this void?! It feels like it gets half full then woosh it's empty and im back to being angry and distraught!


   
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Re: relapsed. - December 10th 2011, 06:46 AM

Hey Katie,

Although your goal was to lose weight to impress somebody, in the end, the goal is never realized because you're really not impressing yourself. You know the truth behind your weightloss, and you feel regret about it. I would recommend you talk to a doctor/nutritionist/dietitian about a weight loss/exercise plan that will help you stay thin without harming your body, as laxatives do. I would also think about the real reasons you want to lose weight. Are you actually overweight? Do you need it for your health? As fun as revenge can be, especially when it involves improving your lifestyle, if you are suffering, it's not worth it.

I'll also leave the Guide to Healthy Eating. This will help you get some more ideas about healthy lifestyles and how to keep your weight at a healthy low level without the use of dangerous pills. Remember more importantly that your BMI or what dress size you are doesn't matter. Are you healthy? Do you feel good? Does your doctor say its fine? I have a larger BMI than most people because of my bone structure, though my doctor said I'm average to slightly below average. BMI and such cannot judge you, and so can't society's skewed view.

Feel free to message me if you ever need!



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Re: relapsed. - December 18th 2011, 11:35 PM

Abusing yourself isn't gonna make your self esteem better. If you feel bad about yourself already, treating yourself like dirt is just gonna make you feel like dirt Katie. I know it's hard when things hurt so bad but I want you to try to be gentle with yourself. You deserve that girl. If you ever need to talk about anything feel free to pm/vm


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