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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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I want to be intoxicated... - March 1st 2014, 08:30 AM

Yeah, I want to be intoxicated. Feelings of doubt and worry lessen and I have more balls to do something, I'm tired of worrying and doubting that I feel in my body and just live life... I have some confidence, but it's getting hard.

And I only have good memories while I was intoxicated, hell, I took a big step regaining my social life while a small bit intoxicated. Goddamn.


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 1st 2014, 02:51 PM

Well mate let me tell you something.
Gettin' drunk from time to time, according to my standards, is pretty normal.
Now i aint a parent or something, but for 16 year old dude to be drunk every weekend or every other weekend as long as you dont do stupid shit or get hurt or fuck up your school is ok. I did that, i still do that from time to time and im excellent when people ask me to be.
Now, let me tell you a small piece of information.
If you drink at 16 years of age for 6 months (regulary) chances are you will get addicted. And those chances are pretty fucking high, like 90%. If you drink the same amount at age of 25 you would need 12 years of drinking to get addicted.
My proposal is to watch out for the dosage. If you like getting wrecked so much you throw up on everything, piss on yourself and find your self in a diffrent part of the city like few of my friends, i recommend you do it every 3-4 months.
If you like to sip like me, few glasses or beers to enlighten the mood, you can do it every weekend if you keep the dosage normal. That means - 3 shots or three beers and you draw the line there. As soon as you reach for the 4th beer or shot or your friends convice you or a fucking fairy comes down from heaven and tells you that shell blow you if you take that last shot, you go home and stop with any alcohol for a month. Thats how ive been doing it.
Now, to those people who saw my posts in other threads saying i havent drank for months, you need to know something. Binary aint the only dude who is using this profile. Im his friend, its just im too lazy to make my own. xD
So yeah Jordi, if you think you have a strong character and that you can keep it at 3 drinks as i can, go for it. If you cant, get help it aint embarrasing, trust me...

Good luck mate and happy drinking!

R.S.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 1st 2014, 08:28 PM

You use to get intoxicated but no longer? Did you have an addiction? Because that really makes a difference to what is ok. Also, you say intoxicated, not specifically drunk, so do you mean drinking or something else?

I'm not sure what the age laws are in the Netherlands, but I'd be naive to act like people don't get intoxicated underage. However, age restrictions are often in place because intoxicating substances are unhealthy, and can be more so when you are young and growing, so its best to keep intoxication to a minimal, like kee it for special occasions.

If you are fighting an addiction, I suggest you continue to abstain and avoid relapse. If you are not fighting an addiction, then just try be responsible. Don't get completely out of it, stay safe, and be with people you trust.

Also, there's no set amount people need to drink to get addicted. Some people drink frequently all their lives and never get addicted, others get addicted very quickly. There is a strong genetic influence in alcohol addiction. And the amount of alchol you can handle in any one drinking session will also be different to how much others can drink, based on your sex, you size, your metabolism, and how much you've eaten. It can change on different days. So if you are drinking, just be aware of how intoxicated you feel.

It also sounds that its not so much intoxication that you are interested it, but perhaps you want to self medicate? I've been guilty of this, and I'm not judging you, but in the long run, intoxication changes the way your brain works, and can add to anxiety(/worry), and you can come to rely on it. Its good to try and work on this issues rather than use a substance to cover them up for a few hours. Do you have any support? From family or friends, or even some form of counselor/therapist?
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 1st 2014, 09:02 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Invert View Post
You use to get intoxicated but no longer? Did you have an addiction? Because that really makes a difference to what is ok. Also, you say intoxicated, not specifically drunk, so do you mean drinking or something else?

I'm not sure what the age laws are in the Netherlands, but I'd be naive to act like people don't get intoxicated underage. However, age restrictions are often in place because intoxicating substances are unhealthy, and can be more so when you are young and growing, so its best to keep intoxication to a minimal, like kee it for special occasions.

If you are fighting an addiction, I suggest you continue to abstain and avoid relapse. If you are not fighting an addiction, then just try be responsible. Don't get completely out of it, stay safe, and be with people you trust.

Also, there's no set amount people need to drink to get addicted. Some people drink frequently all their lives and never get addicted, others get addicted very quickly. There is a strong genetic influence in alcohol addiction. And the amount of alchol you can handle in any one drinking session will also be different to how much others can drink, based on your sex, you size, your metabolism, and how much you've eaten. It can change on different days. So if you are drinking, just be aware of how intoxicated you feel.

It also sounds that its not so much intoxication that you are interested it, but perhaps you want to self medicate? I've been guilty of this, and I'm not judging you, but in the long run, intoxication changes the way your brain works, and can add to anxiety(/worry), and you can come to rely on it. Its good to try and work on this issues rather than use a substance to cover them up for a few hours. Do you have any support? From family or friends, or even some form of counselor/therapist?
Ironically enough, my ex is supporting me.


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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 3rd 2014, 12:18 AM

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Originally Posted by 8!n4ry8unny View Post
Good luck mate and happy drinking!

R.S.
I disagree, I don't think advocating drinking is a good idea, especially when the OP wants to be intoxicated in order to feel better.
While a drink here and there when you are of age (not sure when that is for the Netherlands) is okay, you should only drink recreationally with friends and you should always be safe about it. You should never drink in order to compensate for your problems. Even if you drink and put shades over how you're feeling, eventually you're going to sober up and feel the exact same as you do now. Instead of fixing things for the short-term, you need to actively work on feeling more confident by yourself.
Yes, being intoxicated can be fun. But it will only cause more problems if you try and use it to solve some. As Invert said, it sounds like you're trying to self-medicate. It's pretty common, but it's not exactly the best way to go about things.
I'm glad to hear that your ex is supporting you through this. Having people you can rely on and talk to can be very beneficial. If you have a school counselor, going to talk to them can be helpful too.


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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 3rd 2014, 05:28 AM

Lol, the irony... (your name is intoxication )
An in my defence (actually R.S.'s defence), i must say that jordi said that he likes to be intoxicated because he feels better. He has too much worries, and wants to relax from time to time, just let go and dont care about anything else, for a certain amount of time...
Also, Nicole, while i see that your adult hormones have kicked in and thats great, you have to realize that saying intoxication is bad for teens, it wont actually do anything. The worlds situation is too bad for them to listen. Thats why i went with a diffrent route, i didnt ban it, i just made a few tips and tricks so he can relax, but without consequences...

Anyways, jordi what ever you decide, TH is here to help in any way possible...

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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 3rd 2014, 12:53 PM

Thanks Swen.

Also, the drinking age is 18 in Netherlands, used to be 16 until 1st of January, but when I'm at my grandma or just chilling at a bar with my cousin, I just drink a Radler or beer cause I don't care much. I never drank more than two cans.


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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 3rd 2014, 06:30 PM

The fact that you like I are under age to be drinking, necking a few drinks will not alleviate your particular problem because long-term, you will want to return to drinking again. And again. And again. It's the effect that alcohol brings relief in the short term, but does not extend that feeling of wellbeing after one's body has absorbed it and you return to everyday awareness, usually of the dreadful hangover kind.

I only drink a glass of wine when given it at mealtimes by my mother. That way, in our house that is set in some vast field of some 200 acres, I am not at risk by Mr Policeman or his social worker flunkies rattling the doorknob, and anyway, mum likes a glass of wine to accompany her meals while she's yakking like a gattling gun.

Drink with Mum and Dad, that way you're on the side of 'legal' when they offer a beer. Don't do it on your own, or you will find temptation rearing its head the moment you hit a downer. Underage, unsupervised drinking could lead to being irresponsible to yourself and later, possibly an alcohol problem in the future. Just saying.

Anyway I hope you will get feeling better soon. It's no fun being a teenager sometimes, but we have to make try and the best of a shit deal.

Alex



   
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 3rd 2014, 08:53 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jordioa18 View Post
Ironically enough, my ex is supporting me.
I'm glad you have someone to support you. As I said, if you aren't fighting an addiction, there's nothing wrong with enjoying drinking sometimes. Just try to be responsible about it, and don't rely on it to deal with your problems. Once you sober up, the problems are still there, so its good to try deal with them directly. Its understandable in the meantime you will sometimes want a quick relief, and I get that, but you need to find other ways to overcome these problems in the long term, as alcohol will not always be a solution. I say this as someone who did this for years. I still enjoy drinking sometimes, but I do it for fun now with friends, and I find I have a much healthier relationship with alcohol now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 8!n4ry8unny View Post
Lol, the irony... (your name is intoxication )
An in my defence (actually R.S.'s defence), i must say that jordi said that he likes to be intoxicated because he feels better. He has too much worries, and wants to relax from time to time, just let go and dont care about anything else, for a certain amount of time...
Also, Nicole, while i see that your adult hormones have kicked in and thats great, you have to realize that saying intoxication is bad for teens, it wont actually do anything. The worlds situation is too bad for them to listen. Thats why i went with a diffrent route, i didnt ban it, i just made a few tips and tricks so he can relax, but without consequences...
I get that you mean well, and to some extent, I agree with some of what you advised. Realistically, a lot of young people will drink (and I was definitely guilty of this myself), and so we should be there for people who are doing this. But some of the information you provided is not in fact accurate. And its not safe, even occasionally to get totally wasted, because that is when people act stupid and get hurt, or suffer from alcohol poisoning (which has lead to a number of deaths). It is a decision the OP will have to make for himself, but lets give him accurate information to make that decision with, not just a green light.
   
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 9th 2014, 04:09 AM

Drinking at our age man is degenerative. I see nothing good coming from drinking (besides some stories) and though it apparently affects you in a more positive way - I've seen/heard it at our age cause brutal assaults, vandalism, destruction of property, unprotected sex and rape in my local areas at house parties.. and some of these predicaments occurred from people who had the exact same reason why they wanted to get drunk (let loose, socialise, feel better) etc. You must think I'm a deadset idiot thinking I'm assuming you're going to assault, rape or vandalise etc, well I'm not purporting that at all. I'm saying that once your inhibitions runs free and especially at an age where we tend to be more out of control/reckless possibilities can open up to us... and even to adults.

Remember, prolonged exposure to alcohol, you're going to depend on it. From experience, I'm not going to be binge drinking or drinking in large amounts until I'm finally an adult but even then, I'm hoping my inhibition doesn't let loose and I binge drink. I'd gladly touch unadulterated MDMA or weed over alcohol any day. Depending on genetics, environment and psychology you may run a possible predisposition for alcohol dependency. So be extra careful, drink until tipsy not until blind drunk.



   
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 10th 2014, 10:43 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by 8!n4ry8unny View Post
Lol, the irony... (your name is intoxication )
Also, Nicole, while i see that your adult hormones have kicked in and thats great, you have to realize that saying intoxication is bad for teens, it wont actually do anything. The worlds situation is too bad for them to listen. Thats why i went with a diffrent route, i didnt ban it, i just made a few tips and tricks so he can relax, but without consequences...
Firstly, my username is unrelated.
I know that telling teenagers to not drink won't solve the problem, that wasn't my point. But here on TeenHelp, we advocate not using alcohol or substances to solve problems. Its important to be able to solve your problems sober so that if a similar problem arises, you don't have to rely on anything but yourself to fix it. These problem-solving skills are something that everyone should have.


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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 15th 2014, 04:12 PM

Hello Jordi,

Drinking is a privilege to have and abusing the system can cause many problems down the road. Your under age in your country and I understand that it used to be 16 the legal age until they changed that law. Do you know why they changed that law? There are so many reasons why laws get changed. Finding out why they had changed that law can educate you on understanding why.

Could you post back and explain that for me?

No one can stop you from drinking. However, serving a minor under age can result in fines for that waiter/server and owner of the bar. Here in Canada if your caught selling alcohol to minors you get a fine, could lose your liqueur license, and possibly going to jail. I am unsure if those are in place where you are.

Since the law has just changed I can understand why it is hard for you to not go to bars and drink. I get the sense that that privilege was thrown under you and now you are not following those new laws. There are so many ways to obtain alcohol without going to a bar and risking fines for drinking. Most young adults drink at home where it's comfortable and they know getting caught by authorities is slim to nothing. I am not encouraging you, I am making you aware there are more alternative ways that are safer for everyone.

I can't tell you, "yes, this is okay." I also can't tell you, "this is wrong please don't do this." There are many sides to a story than just one-sided.

I wanted you to be aware, the reason why these laws are in place are because you're still growing and to drink may affect that growing time. You are still growing at 16 and will continue to grow a few years after 16, then to be drinking a lot it can affect you.

However, if you have a safe drink once in awhile that is up to you. If you want to have a safe drink but get really intoxicated then that is also up to you. If you want to have a unsafe drink that is up to you. If you want to have a unsafe drink to the point your intoxicated that is up to you.

I also wanted to talk a little bit about your self-esteem and social circle. Having low self-esteem can lead to many activities; healthy or unhealthy ones, regardless it's how we deal with our self-esteem that matters. If you find drinking to lift your self-esteem (self-confidence) and helps you with social interactions, I think you need to ask yourself whether or not you want to improve your self-esteem and social circle without the use of alcohol. If that is the only solution than you need to be aware of the negative affects. I'm going to give you some suggestions on how to increase your self-esteem and expand your social circle.

Self-Esteem:
Do activities that you enjoy; that make you feel good about yourself.
Here are some links about self-esteem

Stressing Out- Low Self-Esteem

KidsHealth- How Can I Improve My Self-Esteem

Social Circle:
What are your interests? Find your interest then go find others who share that interest (EX. if you enjoy playing video games, try to find a place where you can go play video games with others. This can help cause you know about video games so it's easier to talk to someone)

Knowing why you want to be intoxicated can help you understand what draws you to drinking. If you know what draws you to drinking, look at why that does draw you to drinking. Knowing and understanding why we do things can really help ourselves to understand our own emotions.


Take Care,
Chantal


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  (#13 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 15th 2014, 04:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Maleia View Post
Hello Jordi,

Drinking is a privilege to have and abusing the system can cause many problems down the road. Your under age in your country and I understand that it used to be 16 the legal age until they changed that law. Do you know why they changed that law? There are so many reasons why laws get changed. Finding out why they had changed that law can educate you on understanding why.

Could you post back and explain that for me?

No one can stop you from drinking. However, serving a minor under age can result in fines for that waiter/server and owner of the bar. Here in Canada if your caught selling alcohol to minors you get a fine, could lose your liqueur license, and possibly going to jail. I am unsure if those are in place where you are.

Since the law has just changed I can understand why it is hard for you to not go to bars and drink. I get the sense that that privilege was thrown under you and now you are not following those new laws. There are so many ways to obtain alcohol without going to a bar and risking fines for drinking. Most young adults drink at home where it's comfortable and they know getting caught by authorities is slim to nothing. I am not encouraging you, I am making you aware there are more alternative ways that are safer for everyone.

I can't tell you, "yes, this is okay." I also can't tell you, "this is wrong please don't do this." There are many sides to a story than just one-sided.

I wanted you to be aware, the reason why these laws are in place are because you're still growing and to drink may affect that growing time. You are still growing at 16 and will continue to grow a few years after 16, then to be drinking a lot it can affect you.

However, if you have a safe drink once in awhile that is up to you. If you want to have a safe drink but get really intoxicated then that is also up to you. If you want to have a unsafe drink that is up to you. If you want to have a unsafe drink to the point your intoxicated that is up to you.

I also wanted to talk a little bit about your self-esteem and social circle. Having low self-esteem can lead to many activities; healthy or unhealthy ones, regardless it's how we deal with our self-esteem that matters. If you find drinking to lift your self-esteem (self-confidence) and helps you with social interactions, I think you need to ask yourself whether or not you want to improve your self-esteem and social circle without the use of alcohol. If that is the only solution than you need to be aware of the negative affects. I'm going to give you some suggestions on how to increase your self-esteem and expand your social circle.

Self-Esteem:
Do activities that you enjoy; that make you feel good about yourself.
Here are some links about self-esteem

Stressing Out- Low Self-Esteem

KidsHealth- How Can I Improve My Self-Esteem

Social Circle:
What are your interests? Find your interest then go find others who share that interest (EX. if you enjoy playing video games, try to find a place where you can go play video games with others. This can help cause you know about video games so it's easier to talk to someone)

Knowing why you want to be intoxicated can help you understand what draws you to drinking. If you know what draws you to drinking, look at why that does draw you to drinking. Knowing and understanding why we do things can really help ourselves to understand our own emotions.


Take Care,
Chantal
To answer your question, they want to prevent underage coma drinking, something I really dispise. I've never drank more than 2 glasses of Radler (Beer with a lemon edge, 2% alcohol) in my life, I don't want to get piss drunk since that goes against me. I just want some more balls, more masculinity and care less about my social limitations.


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  (#14 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 15th 2014, 05:04 PM

Hey there Jordi,

Being more masculine doesn't always have to be everything. Most guys are more feminine than masculine and vise versa.

What I think you need right now is to go outside of your comfort zone, do something you want to do. It can be difficult and scary but if you don't expand you will continue to feel the same way. Taking risks in our lives does help us grow, do you take risks at all?

Risk taking is apart of us, can you think of a time where you took a risk (a risk of talking to someone, trying something new, perhaps challenging your feelings and thoughts)?

Exploring risk taking can really help us learn it can ease our anxieties more. It's like you get on a roller-coaster and you dislike those kinds of rides and you are taking a risk. A risk could be the fear of falling, fear of not being in control, not wanting to be scared, etc., those are all risk taking feelings and thoughts. So you're on that roller coaster and there is no turning back, can't get out and it's moving. You got yourself there, now you need to take that risk. Experiencing things when we take risks will help us. So, at the end of that ride it stops you might not want to go back on it or you go back on it again. That is an example of risk taking.

Is there something you would like to try for risk taking? Maybe start out small.

I wanted to make note, you've done risk taking activities when you were a toddler; with walking. That is another example. If you never tried to walk as a toddler things would be different. That toddler took risks after risk, lets take a step, oh no I fell and hit my bum hard *cries* but tries again.

I hope this gives you some idea's to try out as risk taking to meeting others. Would you like to try something outside of your comfort zone? Where would you like to start? What would you need to achieve that goal? Is there someone in your life you can receive some encouragement?


Take Care,
Chantal


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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 15th 2014, 07:14 PM

On a side note, if all you've ever had in one sitting was 2 beers at 2% alcohol, assuming you are about average for your age in terms of size and metabolism, the alcohol is unlikely to have had much effect (in the UK at least, you'd still have been legally able to drive). What I'm getting at here is that the confidence boost you experienced was quite possibly not from alcohol lowering your inhibitions, but a placebo effect. So you were more confident because you believed your inhibitions were lower, but it was actually your own confidence all along. So maybe you can tap into that without booze?
   
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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 15th 2014, 11:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Maleia View Post
Hey there Jordi,

Being more masculine doesn't always have to be everything. Most guys are more feminine than masculine and vise versa.

What I think you need right now is to go outside of your comfort zone, do something you want to do. It can be difficult and scary but if you don't expand you will continue to feel the same way. Taking risks in our lives does help us grow, do you take risks at all?

Risk taking is apart of us, can you think of a time where you took a risk (a risk of talking to someone, trying something new, perhaps challenging your feelings and thoughts)?

Exploring risk taking can really help us learn it can ease our anxieties more. It's like you get on a roller-coaster and you dislike those kinds of rides and you are taking a risk. A risk could be the fear of falling, fear of not being in control, not wanting to be scared, etc., those are all risk taking feelings and thoughts. So you're on that roller coaster and there is no turning back, can't get out and it's moving. You got yourself there, now you need to take that risk. Experiencing things when we take risks will help us. So, at the end of that ride it stops you might not want to go back on it or you go back on it again. That is an example of risk taking.

Is there something you would like to try for risk taking? Maybe start out small.

I wanted to make note, you've done risk taking activities when you were a toddler; with walking. That is another example. If you never tried to walk as a toddler things would be different. That toddler took risks after risk, lets take a step, oh no I fell and hit my bum hard *cries* but tries again.

I hope this gives you some idea's to try out as risk taking to meeting others. Would you like to try something outside of your comfort zone? Where would you like to start? What would you need to achieve that goal? Is there someone in your life you can receive some encouragement?


Take Care,
Chantal
I just had a movie night with some friends. That got out of my comfort zone.


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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 16th 2014, 08:35 PM

Hello Jordi,

I am glad you hung out with some friends. May I ask how it went? After the hangout how did you feel? Did you feel a little better, worse, overwhelmed? It's important to push our feelings in a healthy way and by going to hangout with your friends this helps you build up your self-confidence.

Do you have anything else coming up that you are nervous about?

I am really glad you were able to go out of your comfort zone.

Take Care,
Chantal


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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 17th 2014, 08:21 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Maleia View Post
Hello Jordi,

I am glad you hung out with some friends. May I ask how it went? After the hangout how did you feel? Did you feel a little better, worse, overwhelmed? It's important to push our feelings in a healthy way and by going to hangout with your friends this helps you build up your self-confidence.

Do you have anything else coming up that you are nervous about?

I am really glad you were able to go out of your comfort zone.

Take Care,
Chantal
I felt it was a succesful night and my friends also want something like this again. Next week I might go out of my comfort zone AGAIN, and I feel pretty good about that as well.


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Re: I want to be intoxicated... - March 18th 2014, 12:51 AM

Hello Jordi,

I am glad it was a successful night with your friends.

Do you think by going out of your comfort zone a little bit here and a little bit there can allow you to not be drinking to get that buzz to talk to others and have a social life? I think you can do that without drinking which you find easier to talk to others because you already had a successful hangout with your friends, what do you think?

I'm not saying don't drink, a lot of people drink socially but it becomes a problem if you just drink to be social, you should be able to be social without drinking. So when you are social and have a drink it will be a lot different.


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