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Gallade
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Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 13th 2009, 06:28 AM

I have had my eye on this girl for a year. I even tried asking her out to prom and she would have gone with me, but she already had something planned with her friends on that day, which was true. (side note: for those that followed my Prom countdown topic involving paper cushions earlier this year, this is a different girl.)

But for the past 10 days, I've been thinking about her weed addiction. She told me on facebook she blazes and once I found out, we stopped talking for a week. I got to make up with her eventually, but fact is she still smokes. There is a picture on facebook of her smoking, and when one of her friends told her to stop, she posted hoping they would stop commenting on that picture. This got myself to thinking maybe she doesn't really care what other people think.

I'm in university and she is in grade 12. I do not get to go home very often to try and talk to her face to face. At this point I don't really care if we are together or not. I just want to get her off the stuff.
   
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Re: Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 13th 2009, 02:07 PM

Firstly, you can't get physically addicted to weed unless it is laced with other substances so I don't suppose she's addicted but just likes to smoke it sometimes as do many people. May I ask why this is so important to you? Surely it's her business whether she smokes weed or not? Though you may want to hint to her to be more circumspect, smoking it is illegal and posting pictures of yourself committing a crime on the internet is not the smartest move.

If she really doesn't care what people think about it then I feel your chances of persuading her to stop will only lead to an argument which will result in both of you not talking to each other again.
   
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Re: Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 13th 2009, 02:56 PM

She is "addicted" to weed in the sense that she sometimes skips class to smoke. In addition, she didn't upload the picture, rather, she was tagged instead. It is only a cigarette, not sure if that would count as smoking weed but she is doing it nevertheless. I only implied the "disregard others opinions" part so I can't say for certain she thinks in this sense.

Is it so wrong to show concern for someone I care about? I'm not the type of person to sit and watch my friends ruin their lives.
   
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Re: Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 13th 2009, 03:07 PM

Of course it's not wrong to feel concerned. Smoking weed does not necessarily mean they're going to ruin their lives, many of the most intelligent and successful people I know smoke weed or have done so in the past.

I think the issue here isn't so much smoking weed as the fact that she skips class and therefore not reaching her full educational potential. Having known similar people it seems to me she would be skipping class for something else if it was not for a spliff. Maybe she is just not interested in full time education? Many people aren't, and often they feel happier dropping out of school and going on to do other things. Maybe it would help talking about her motives for this rather than challenging her to stop smoking?
   
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Re: Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 13th 2009, 05:30 PM

I agree with Jack completely. Just because this girl smokes weed doesn't mean she's going to ruin her life. I know tons of normal, successful people whose lives were not ruined by their use of marijuana. I understand your concern about her skipping class to do it, but really, this isn't anything you're going to be able to fix. You know that if you tell a teenager not to do something, they'll often do it just to prove you wrong? So try not to judge her and wait for her to learn her own lesson.


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Re: Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 14th 2009, 08:17 AM

honestly, to make it short and simple, she will figure out if she's going to quit or not one day. but trying to make her change or disliking her for what she does is negative reinforcement and she will only hate you for it.
   
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Re: Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 14th 2009, 08:54 PM

Dude why would you judge someone on something as trivial as cannabis? Let her be her, who are you to tell her that she can't put the smoke of a smoldering flower into her lungs. If you don't like it just quit talking to her, but don't try to change her opinion and get her to quit.

It's non-addictive by the way.
   
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Re: Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 15th 2009, 08:09 AM

She isn't going to have her life ruined just because she smokes weed. It's like saying that you'll avoid going out with a girl because she eats spicy food or because she likes asparagus on pizza. It's irrelevant, if you're going to potentially like the girl, then you'll understand everyone has their own flaws and you'll be fine with their flaws.

I would say for the sake of keeping things simple and less heated between you two, to ignore it. If you get into telling her to quit and she refuses, it's just going to lead to an argument where you two are likely to separate.
   
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Re: Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 16th 2009, 05:23 PM

Again, I know it is non addicting. My wording was a bit off. I meant addicted in the sense she rather skip class.

I don't know why I made this topic in the first place. This situation seems so insignificant now. But cut me some slack, at least I tried to show concern for someone I care about. This is the first true experience with drugs I have had. I hear stories about people derailing their life because of weed. Sorry, I just didn't expect responses of letting it go.

Close this topic please, it is taking up space for the more important threads out there.
   
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Re: Arrgh she smokes weed... - October 16th 2009, 05:45 PM

Hey, don't feel bad. You asked a question and sometimes people don't give you the answers you expect or want to hear. Remember, you know the situation better than us and we can only advise you from the facts you've given us, if you think we're wrong you're not obliged to take out advice.

Good luck. It's nice to see someone concerned for others anyway.

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