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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
BlaqkLiiteX Offline
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Smokers, should I be worried? - January 20th 2010, 04:26 AM

I hope this is the right place for this.


This is a little long, but I could really use some input.. thanks. So.. I dunno about any of you smokers out there.
But when I smoked my first cigarette I didn't think to myself, "Yep, I'm gonna be a chain smoking nicotine addicted sonofab***h." But I started slowly smoking more and more, and now I am.
My boyfriend is an asthmatic nonsmoker. He does like to get drunk and smoke a cigarette sometimes because the nicotine rush makes him all tingly, and I get that.
I've been dating him for a year, and the first eight months we were together he smoked like.. two cigarettes, so I wasn't very concerned. The past two or three months he has been smoking a cigarette whilst drunk every like.. week or two, until the past like two weeks, he has been smoking a cigarette with me everytime he gets drunk.
I tried to tell him at one point "I'm not giving you any more cigarettes for a while, you've been smoking more and more often." But it didn't work.
He's just like "Yeah, I thought you knew me better than that I'm not going to start actually smoking cigarettes." and gets all defensive about it.
He hasn't smoked a cigarette at all whilst sober, but it's still making me worry a little bit. I don't want him to become a smoker but I think it might be happening and he doesn't even realize it.
I dunno what I'm supposed to do or if this should even be a legitimate concern?

Last edited by BlaqkLiiteX; January 20th 2010 at 04:47 AM.
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 20th 2010, 04:47 AM

i understand ur concern and f u ask me having him stop before he starts will make quitting a lot easier for him, at the same time if hes only havin a cigg or 2 when hes drinking u might not need to worry, i know a lot of ppl who wouldnt think of smoking but when hey get hammered they want a cigg like any addict would. so i guess im sayin that while u caught this in the bud and probably dont hav anything to worry bout id still say stop his habbit before it can start


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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 20th 2010, 02:28 PM

You doing it in front of him is one of the biggest causes for his smoking and him getting drunk frequently. Either you don't do it around him, or quit. Pretty much when people are smoking only when they're high or drunk, it'll start habituating itself when sober.
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 20th 2010, 04:53 PM

Yes you should be concerned, but I agree with ^^ stop smoking around him. Also - you can't really 'have words' with him unless you're planning on quitting, more that a tad hypocritical.
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 20th 2010, 08:19 PM

I can understand why you would be concerned.
I know very very few people... ok in fact only 2 people who do smoke only occassionally like that.
But they have never started smoking regularly and they have been doing that for quite a long time, but they also havent increased the amount they smoke.

You cant stop him from doing it, and you cant tell him its wrong when you do it yourself. Some people have the mind set "if they do it why cant I?"
Maybe advise him that you regret starting and make it clear you dont want him to do the same, dont tell him to stop completly but maybe just point it out to him. Tell him to be careful so it doesnt become a habit like yours?
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 20th 2010, 09:27 PM

When I was in this position, I just held firm and said no more. Tell him you do trust him, but tobacco is addictive. Explain to him how you never thought you'd start smoking properly either.



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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 20th 2010, 10:27 PM

Well there are some people that just smoke when they drink although it can build up over time.

It seems to me that your boyfriend is becoming a smoker slowly but surly. Unfortunately its extremely hard to stop but I suggest you don’t feed the hobbit. Its even more scary because he’s already got lunge issues.
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 21st 2010, 04:58 AM

Chelsea, how many smokes are we talking here? Because, If he really does only smoke cigs while drinking/drunk he may keep it that way.
I've smoked for 2 years, and besides like 3 months of that time, I REALLY only smoke cigs if im drinking or blazing, every once and a while I have one sober, and i've kept it this way for as long as i've been smoking.
Bassically, if he starts smoking when he's sober start talking to him about it, but having a cig when your drinking once and a while isn't a horrible thing.

a few cigs a week won't do alot of damage (:
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 21st 2010, 05:53 PM

Hey Chelsea,
I can understand your concern about your boyfriend.
I don't think this is anything to be too worried about.
The only thing I would tell your boyfriend to be careful of is the fact he has asthma, it could trigger an asthma attack or make his asthma worse in the long run. I'm sure he knows all of this but just remind him every once in a while.
Paige xox
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 21st 2010, 07:15 PM

I'm pretty much going to say the same thing others have. I do have multiple friends who only smoke when drinking and they seem fine. The concern you have for your boyfriend is amazing, and it's awesome you care so much though.

Also, with any addiction, you can't stop him from becoming addicted to anything, and if you worry about it all the time, then it will hurt you, not him. He will find cigarettes other places if he needs to, etc.

Try explaining your concern while he's sober. Talk it out, if the conversation gets heated, then walk away until you can calmly talk again.

Hope everything turns out well!
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 22nd 2010, 02:02 AM

Thanks you guys.
I was hoping that maybe I was a little too worried about this, but sometimes it's hard to tell without an outside opinion or two.
I do hope he does keep it to whilst intoxicated, but I am gonna nicely remind him sometimes to be careful for the sake of his asthma and not becoming addicted and whatnots.
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 22nd 2010, 01:18 PM

maybe get him some ciggs with less nicotine for when hes drinkin...


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  (#13 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 22nd 2010, 08:09 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by darkinnocenteyes View Post
maybe get him some ciggs with less nicotine for when hes drinkin...
They make those?..
Unless you mean lights, he won't smoke those anyhow. =\
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 23rd 2010, 01:06 PM

What do you mean "less nicotine?" It doesn't matter if a cigarette has more or less nicotine....it's nicotine.
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 23rd 2010, 03:00 PM

Some cigarettes contain less nicotine in them which is better than smoking cigarettes with more nicotine, obviously smoking is not good full stop.
   
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Re: Smokers, should I be worried? - January 23rd 2010, 07:53 PM

It's his choice to smoke. I wouldn't worry about it too much. People smoke daily and it doesn't hurt them.
   
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