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Perseus Offline
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Can't function socially. - November 20th 2011, 06:10 PM

I used to drink a lot. It helped for my depression, and getting drunk alone every day was a way to pass the time. I cut it off completely recently. Problem is, I can't function socially without it. A long time ago, when I had friends to go to parties with, I was always 'on' when I was drunk. I felt like I was the most popular person there, and everything I said was the perfect thing that would make people laugh.

I recently tried going back to school, but I couldn't handle it. I can't even talk to people. My chest starts beating fast, I get a feeling of insane claustrophobia, my voice cracks, my mind blanks. I eventually just shut my mouth and never talked. People thought I was mute. I'm a bit better talking to say, someone behind the counter at a store. But that doesn't even matter. I'm never going to make any friends if I can't socially function in school. I'm now terrified of going back, as well as getting a job, because of this. No one is going to hire a socially inept loser, and if they do, they're going to regret they didn't.

All kids my age do is talk about smoking weed or drinking. I can't stand it. My age, I'm supposed to be going to parties and drinking, where I can be more relaxed. But that's not going to happen if I can't even talk to people sober.

I've been drinking a bit before I go out, and it helps. Taking a shot or two in the morning makes me feel like a normal person before I go off into the world. I hate how terrible I am at everything, that I NEED it to cope with the smallest uncomfortable situation. I don't know what to do anymore...
   
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Re: Can't function socially. - November 20th 2011, 08:54 PM

Hey there, welcome to Teenhelp.

Alcohol can cause this to happen especially if youíve become accustom to drinking daily. So I just wanted to say good work cutting down, for a while it can be hard to socialize. The point I think you should understand is that you canít live on it. There has to be a point where you face you fear and accept the person you are.

Donít get down on yourself, Iíve been there and it can be a struggle you climb out of that hole. You mentioned that youíre supposed to be going to parties and drinking, well thatís not entirely true. I think you should enjoy yourself and do things that make you happy regardless of what others may think.

Your not terrible at everything, the reality is there will always be someone better. Donít let that affect the way you shape character. In a perfect world I wish there where things I could do better, there are things I wish I could take back. Moving forward we just need to make sure the mistakes weíve made in the past donít reoccur in the future.

When I was heavily involved in drugs I felt as though Iíd never see day light again. Once I quit I found that making positive choices made me feel better as a person. If you want to know the truth, Teenhelp was that point. In stead of hanging out with my so called friends that would introduce me to the parting life style I came here and tried to help people. Sure some people could bash me for it but reality is it makes me feel better for all the bad things Iíve done.

It all boils down to you and the decisions you have to make to feel better about the person youíve become. Drugs arenít the answer, right now it seems impossible to ever talk to people sober but after a while you will get more comfortable. Looking back do you see why these substances control your life? I feel for you because I had word for word the problems youíre going through. The sad truth is that time is the only cure, practice going out with people and being sober.

Lately Iíve been the DD and Iíve made a ton of cash doing it, along more quality friends. You just need to say enough is enough and enjoy yourself all the same. If youíre anything like me and have an addicting personally itís probably in your best interest to keep clean until youíve got the issues you struggle with most resolved.

I wish you all the best mate, if thereís anything I can do to help you just let me know. If youíd like to chat on Livehelp by all means feel free to message me and weíll set something up.

Take care.
   
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Re: Can't function socially. - November 21st 2011, 05:34 AM

i understand where ure coming from,i guess if u drink u relax and feel like u can say anything to anyone, but the thing is i've noticed that when i go to parties and am usually the only one sober i see that the people who are most drunk and outgoing and who think they own the room , well they just look plain stupid to me and usually make huge asses out of themselves for attention, i guess what im trying to say is ur vision of everything changes when ure drunk and i dont think it changes for the better, u can go out and not drink and have awesome time... also personally i'd rather want to talk to someone who's shy and quiet than to the drunk lound and annoying people at the party
   
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