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My nan has Alzheimer's - August 12th 2012, 08:26 PM

My nan broke her leg a few months ago. She has been in hospital recovering. The doctors noticed that she is quite confused a lot of the time so they give a brain scan. Turns out she has Alzheimer's which will eventually get worse :/

I know she hasn't got long left She's 85, has Alzheimer's and has a plate in her leg. She also seems depressed.

It's also hard to have a conversation with her now, she's confused. I went to visit her a few days ago and she told me the hospital is also a post office it isn't. She also seems much snappier and annoyed than usual.

It's weird because when I think of her dying I don't feel sad, I just feel numb. Surely I should be upset :/

Eh. I had to get this out somewhere

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Re: My nan has Alzheimer's - August 13th 2012, 01:36 AM

Hi there.

I'm sorry about your Nan. Alzheimers normally affects part of the brain called the cerebral cortex, sometimes its a bit deeper than where this is and you're right, its a progressive illness which means its gradually gets worse. There is however treatments that are available to to put support in place and to manage the illness.

I don't think that's unusual. We all cope with things in different ways and feel different emotions. That's just the way you handle it. Remember not to be alone in this. Talk to people when you need them and find healthy ways to cope with whats going on.


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Re: My nan has Alzheimer's - August 13th 2012, 01:40 AM

I'm sorry about what you're going through right now, I really am.

In a way, it's okay that you don't feel upset. Maybe it's something that will impact you later, or it's just how you're going to cope with it. It doesn't mean you love her any less.

My grandfather died August 10th of 2007 from complications of his Alzheimer's disease so I can kind of relate to that. They do sometimes get confused as to what's going on or where they are, like my grandfather's big thing was names. He'd reverse my sister's and my mother's names, or just plain forget. He remembered me as "The Baby" and not by Desiree, and he'd be mean to my cousin sometimes.

It can be hard to have conversations with her sometimes, but it's good that you try and show that you love and care about her. Maybe you can even do something nice for her, like when my grandfather was in the nursing home we threw him a birthday party and accidentally put a trick candle on the cake, and it got him laughing. Little things your family does to show they care, even just paying visits, can go a long way. Even if they get confused it'd be good to visit them.

It can be scary to watch someone with Alzheimer's progress through it. Make sure you take care of yourself during that time and just talk to someone about it if you need to because you aren't alone. And even though she doesn't have long, make the best out of the time the two of you have together, and I don't know what you believe, but at least in my opinion once she passes, it will be sad but at least she'll be out of pain.

Sorry if this doesn't make sense, I did have to post and tell you I care. PM me at any time if you need anything!

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Re: My nan has Alzheimer's - August 13th 2012, 08:23 AM

I know exactly how you feel- my dad has Alzheimer's.

When I was officially told that it was Alzheimer's, I felt numb. I didn't even cry even when my mum was crying. I didn't know why and I felt awful for not crying. As for dying, perhaps it will hit you later, but most people who have loved ones suffering from Alzheimer's see it as a relief, in the end. But what you are feeling right now is normal.

It is hard trying to have conversations and the depression and irritability can actually be part of Alzheimer's. Sometimes I just let my dad ramble on about nothing and smile and nod, or ask simple questions like how are you etc. Another thing, is photo albums. We think that my dad doesn't recognise relatives any more, but he does like to look at the people in the photos and he smiles back and talks to them. Since every case of Alzheimer's is different and they all have "stages", it's impossible to give solid advice since what works for me and my dad, might not work for you and your nan.

I will repeat others advice, that it is important that you look after yourself too, and talk to people when you need to. That said, I'm on here a lot, so feel free to PM me at anytime
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Re: My nan has Alzheimer's - August 13th 2012, 03:47 PM

Thanks guys <33333 At least I know I'm not a heartless bitch. She has always been confused but she was like that when my mum was a kid. She calls me Tracy (my cousin's name) all the time as it is

I'll just have to not take her for granted anymore.

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Re: My nan has Alzheimer's - August 13th 2012, 05:41 PM

You're not a b*tch, and you're not alone. 50% of all individuals 85 years or older suffer from Alzheimer's, so it's very common for family members to deal with a situation like this at some point in their lives. In the United States, the Alzheimer's Association provides support groups and other services for Alzheimer's patients and their family members, so if you're up for it, I would look into joining a group in your country and learning more about what you can expect in the months/years to come. It also might not be a bad idea to find a grief/loss group. Even though your nan hasn't passed yet, you are mourning the loss of her mental capabilities, as well as mourning the knowledge that she will be passing sooner vs. later.

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Re: My nan has Alzheimer's - August 16th 2012, 06:05 PM

I just want to add in here.
My Papa had Alzheimer's for years before he died (of something completely unrelated.) He was in and out of hospital a lot with different things and was always a lot more confused and forgetful when he was in because it was a strange place and it disrupted his usual routine. One time he was convinced the hospital was a hotel and he had to get ready to fly back home. Once she gets back home again she probably won't be as bad because she's back somewhere she recognises. Try not to worry too much about it, it's not as bad as the media makes out.

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