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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Lion Heart Offline
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I am in college and want a piercing, parents disagree - September 24th 2012, 10:58 PM

If I get a piercing my parents are going to take away my car and make me pay for everything with school. This is rediculous, I think I'd have less punishments if I started smoking crack or got pregnent or got married. Seriously am rather annoyed.I looked all normal for them through high school and didnt cut my hair or dye it or do anything excessive, but now I am an adult. I should be able to spend $25 that I earned on the piercing. I could be doing worse things in my freshman college years like partying or trying drugs or only socializing or having lots of sex.Some how I think they'd be more comfortable with that >___>

Seriously in comparision to all the things I could be doing that is tiny and its not permanent!

I feel that with my own spending money I should be allowed to do this. My mother says she will cry every time she looks at me. I've tried to explain that it isnt as bad as she thinks and she is over reacting. The piercing I want is tiny, tiny little thing. Its not like I want a huge ring coming out of my lip or something.

I understand they are paying for my food and college but I think controling my spending money I earn is excessive? Its not like I'm work, getting payed and going off and spending it all. I save most of it and use a little on fun stuff. Like movies or in this case a piercing! I feel a little trapped.

What do you guys think? Should I just get it and hope they except it? Is there anything I can do to convince them? Am I being silly to think I should be able to do what I want with the money I make?
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Always * Offline
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Re: I am in college and want a piercing, parents disagree - September 25th 2012, 07:50 PM

I DO think that threatening to cut you off over a piercing is excessive, but really, what is more important? Finishing school and THEN getting it OR disobeying them, getting cut off and adding a mountain of financial stress (loans, having to work to get by etc) to everything else you have to deal with while being a student. I don't deny that they are being excessively restrictive, but even if you are an adult and presumably not living at home, if you're parents are covering your finances while you are in school you DO have to show them a certain amount of regard for what they want. It's unfair, but you have to think about what is more important. What's the harm in waiting until you are done school?

The other option is to get a piercing they won't be able to see, such as a belly button piercing, and just take it out when you are around them and avoid shirts where you can see it.... But I'd still withhold on the piercing until you can convince them OR are done school. AND the other option is to just disobey them get cut off, not have a car, and go apply for student loans at the bank so you can finish school.

Feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat or have questions
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Re: I am in college and want a piercing, parents disagree - September 26th 2012, 06:55 PM

Bumble Bee summed things up pretty well, so I don't have much to add. =) While your parents ARE being fairly ridiculous with their demands/threats, the bottom-line is that they have every right to withdraw their financial support if they're dissatisfied with what you're doing. Would you rather pay $25 for a piercing now and pay $25,000/yr. in tuition/living costs, or bite the bullet and cater to your parents until you're able to become financially independent? Like Bumble Bee said, there are a few options you can consider. One would be to get the piercing and remove the stud/ring when you're around your parents. Another would be to let things cool down, then have a calm discussion with your parents, asking them what their specific concerns are about you getting a piercing. For example, the piercing may not just be a piercing to them... it may be a sign that you're going down a slippery slope, heading toward a lifetime of drug use and sexual promiscuity. *GASP!* If that's the case, then it could be helpful to discuss things in greater detail with your parents, so you can ease their worries and reach a more reasonable compromise. =)

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