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father's day *rant* possibly triggering - June 15th 2013, 09:15 PM

Hey guys,
So Father's Day is coming up, well it's tomorrow ha! And well, I noticed people are glooomy, at least the people I talk to. Then it hit me, a lot of these people I know don't have dads as in they only live with their mom for whatever reason. I can't help but think how hard it must be for them. I can understand because I don't have a mom, and mother's day is kinda tough for me, but I've gotten used it. Thing is, so many more people I know who are in single parent families don't have dads, than moms. And here I am, actually thinking of cool things to do with my dad tomorrow, and I don't know it I can't help but feel the sadness that I receive from these people's energies. Funny thing I didn't even speak to them face to face, only online but their tone and everything....and then I it hit me what all these people have in common. At least from the ones I've talked to. All of them are also emotional about the topic of dads/fathers and have been depressed from it in the past. Also one of them, she actually told me last week she's feeling sad about it. And it didn't occur to me that fathers day is what's triggering her, because every month she gets upset at least once since her dad died last year. And personally, my family isn't really big on father's day. We do something small, not a huge thing so I wasn't even thinking about it last week. I don't know the point of this thread, but I guess I'm just really thankful to have a dad and also not sure how to deal with my friends' sadness, and its spreading to me, as uneasiness and for some reason I'm also starting to feel down. But I also want to be a good friend and have the right things to say but I don't. Even though it's similar situation with my mom, on mother's day I said I'll spend the day in nature to celebrate mother earth or something like that. Not that these holidays are especially important to me, since I believe in being grateful about parents all year long, but I guess these friends do take it seriously. I still don't have something comforting and empathetic to say to them though except if they want to talk about it, I'm here for them which they know already by now.

Sorry for ranting...just feeling like I'm in a weird and confusing place right now. I wasn't even that close to these people last year, or didn't know some of them, so this is the first time.
   
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Re: father's day *rant* possibly triggering - June 15th 2013, 09:44 PM

I think that maybe you are feeling some of the sadness since you are able to identify them. While you have a father you don't have a mother and therefore you are able to feel some of what they do when it comes closer to days like these. I know that you may not always have the right words to say but I think a lot of people would really appreciate it even knowing that they have someone they can confide in such as you and maybe you can even say how you cope around mother's day, and they can tailor it to father's day. Maybe you can offer to work with them to come up with some coping mechanisms. I think it means a lot knowing that they have someone to talk to though. It's really understandable why they're upset and maybe they can find ways to get it out such as letter writing or self expression in general. I've even heard of some people spend the time with their grandparents, uncles, etc.

But, don't let this stop you from enjoying yourself!


   
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Re: father's day *rant* possibly triggering - June 16th 2013, 07:51 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cataclysmic View Post
I think that maybe you are feeling some of the sadness since you are able to identify them. While you have a father you don't have a mother and therefore you are able to feel some of what they do when it comes closer to days like these. I know that you may not always have the right words to say but I think a lot of people would really appreciate it even knowing that they have someone they can confide in such as you and maybe you can even say how you cope around mother's day, and they can tailor it to father's day. Maybe you can offer to work with them to come up with some coping mechanisms. I think it means a lot knowing that they have someone to talk to though. It's really understandable why they're upset and maybe they can find ways to get it out such as letter writing or self expression in general. I've even heard of some people spend the time with their grandparents, uncles, etc.

But, don't let this stop you from enjoying yourself!
thank you so much Dez <3
I feel better. I spoke to some of them and they seem to be doing fine.
   
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