TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
lunareclipze Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
lunareclipze's Avatar
 
Name: Katie
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada

Posts: 9
Join Date: August 8th 2013

Do I deserve friends after the way I treated my old ones? - August 10th 2013, 10:11 PM

I used to kind of be a b****. All I would do is make fun of others while I was with my friends, I would insult people out loud (only when I was with friends, though) of course they would make fun of people with me.

I caused a lot of drama with my cousin I used to be good friends with.. I would start fights with her friends and turn them against her. Not really on purpose though, she would side with me and wouldn't stand up for them.

I called her best friends best friend fat and she ended up going to the same high school I go to. I had no friends and I was known as the weirdo freak girl with the eating disorder. I never told my cousin or my old friend I had no friends at my school. She told everyone what I said to her and basically I heard them saying that I'm two-faced and she said "just because I don't starve myself.."

I also used to be really good friends with this kid (a longggg time ago) and my other friends would make fun of him together. I then started calling him and hanging up a lot, just to go along with what others thought of him. He found out it was me and called me a stalker. Then again he pulled a lot of **** on me too. He threatened to call the cops on me and bossed me around and blackmailed me all the time for stealing 5c pieces of candy (I was only 9 and I was actually so scared when he brought up the cops.. gosh I feel stupid now)

I also stole my cousins' stuff, told my parents she did something I did and acted like a b at times. I basically took them all for granted and I'm starting to understand why I don't have friends; I don't deserve any after the way I treated them.

I feel bad about all the stuff I did now, but it's a little too late for to apologize to these people. They already know about what a freak I've become and have even said I don't deserve friends. Honestly, it seems like they won't be happy until I'm dead. I can't go outside without hearing them yell at me and call me names, talk about me out loud. Even though I've turned hideous, have no friends and have no fun whatsoever they still seem to think I haven't got enough punishment.

Does it sound like I don't deserve any?
  Send a message via AIM to lunareclipze Send a message via Yahoo to lunareclipze  
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Adam the Fish Offline
The Skittlemeister.
I can't get enough
*********
 
Adam the Fish's Avatar
 
Name: Adam
Age: 20
Gender: Male
Location: Bristol

Posts: 2,343
Blog Entries: 6
Join Date: August 24th 2012

Re: Do I deserve friends after the way I treated my old ones? - August 10th 2013, 10:37 PM

I think the only time I could come to a conclusion where you "don't deserve friends" is if I'm using some sort of twisted, Medieval-style excuse for "justice".

Everyone makes mistakes in life.
What you've done is realised them, and so long as you make sure you don't make such mistakes again, then you certainly deserve another chance.
Be confident in that, or else you'll get nowhere.

I would have to say that maybe it isn't too late to apologise if you're still in contact with any of these people. It might well make you feel a lot better, regardless of what impact it has on them. Just get them privately - either in person or online - and just say that you're sorry for mistakes in the past, but that you're trying very hard to change - would they be willing to forgive you and let you have another chance?

Another thing, though - you label yourself "freak" and "hideous" but you also cite examples where you're being verbally bullied currently.
I wonder whether - regardless of the truth (I'm sure you're not a "freak" or "hideous") of the statements - this bullying had just been going on so long that you're not only now accepting it as something you've "brought upon yourself" but even believe some of what they say about/to you.
Bullying (and what you say these people are saying/doing is bullying) is weak. Things said by bullies are not things you should take to heart, however impossible that sounds.
Given that you're being bullied, I think it would be beneficial for you to tell a trusted adult - a parent, teacher or counsellor - about what's happening, and try and get some help.
You do deserve friends, you do deserve a second chance, you do deserve help through this, but you most certainly do not deserve to be bullied.
You cannot believe what bullies say about you - you are not a freak, nor are you hideous. Get yourself some help from an adult, and I'm always here (PM me) if you need a chat, OK?


Skittlify me up...
Adam the Fish | 26/08/12 | 08/10/12 | 02/12/12 | 09/02/13 | 01/06/13 | 30/08/13 | 25/11/13
...spreading happiness and joy around the Internet!
...well, I try, anyway. .......................
private message.visitor message.profile.email
"May we always remember that we are the rainbow."
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Azure. Offline
Filling My Panties.
I can't get enough
*********
 
Azure.'s Avatar
 
Gender: Female

Posts: 2,249
Blog Entries: 92
Join Date: August 2nd 2013

Re: Do I deserve friends after the way I treated my old ones? - August 10th 2013, 11:37 PM

Hey,
I agree with the person above me. You deserve friends and you should go to an adult about the bullying. I think it is a great thing that you have acknowledged the fact that you have made mistakes. Only strong people can do that. You can change the way you act if you try. Be the best person you can be be confident, be happy, and be yourself. I'm sure you are an amazing person. We ALL make mistakes. You deserve friends and you deserve to be treated nicely.
Good luck with everything, PM or VM me if you want
<3 Nal


vm-pm
♥♥♥
Find your light in a new dawn.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
Member
Outside, huh?
**********
 
Chris's Avatar
 
Name: Chris
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Illinios

Posts: 4,247
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: November 28th 2011

Re: Do I deserve friends after the way I treated my old ones? - August 13th 2013, 02:09 PM

Well, it sounds and looks at first glance that you got what you deserve. Luckily, I believe, and for the most part, the world believes in second chances - and a new chapter in life.

You put your 'friends' and others through hell - with making fun of them, and what not. But, I would say that for the most part - you seemed to be pressured into it. You view yourself in a lower term then human, so to gain friends, and gain popularity, you start being mean to others, because thats what the popular kids do. However, no matter how we try - we unfortunately fit into a category - and that's where we truly belong. Thats where we are ourselves. It's where we view ourselves in the best light. It's where we love ourself. You need to find that light; to find the group you are most comfortable in.

Starting a new chapter, with new people takes alot of time, and surely takes alot of dedication. It may seem like the world is ending - like things won't change, and maybe they won't while in high school, however once you go to college, once you get a job, once you move out of your house, once you create your own life - you will have the opportunity of starting over & creating a 'true' self.

So, keep pushing forward. Keep being yourself - and sooner than later, you will find a group of friends in which you won't have to change yourself. A group of friends in which you don't have to make fun of others to feel better or more likable.


Best wishes,
Chris


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
lunareclipze Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
lunareclipze's Avatar
 
Name: Katie
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada

Posts: 9
Join Date: August 8th 2013

Re: Do I deserve friends after the way I treated my old ones? - August 18th 2013, 06:30 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris. View Post
Well, it sounds and looks at first glance that you got what you deserve. Luckily, I believe, and for the most part, the world believes in second chances - and a new chapter in life.

You put your 'friends' and others through hell - with making fun of them, and what not. But, I would say that for the most part - you seemed to be pressured into it. You view yourself in a lower term then human, so to gain friends, and gain popularity, you start being mean to others, because thats what the popular kids do. However, no matter how we try - we unfortunately fit into a category - and that's where we truly belong. Thats where we are ourselves. It's where we view ourselves in the best light. It's where we love ourself. You need to find that light; to find the group you are most comfortable in.

Starting a new chapter, with new people takes alot of time, and surely takes alot of dedication. It may seem like the world is ending - like things won't change, and maybe they won't while in high school, however once you go to college, once you get a job, once you move out of your house, once you create your own life - you will have the opportunity of starting over & creating a 'true' self.

So, keep pushing forward. Keep being yourself - and sooner than later, you will find a group of friends in which you won't have to change yourself. A group of friends in which you don't have to make fun of others to feel better or more likable.


Best wishes,
Chris
I don't want to spend the last year of high school as I did the last 3
  Send a message via AIM to lunareclipze Send a message via Yahoo to lunareclipze  
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
deserve, friends, treated

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.