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SouthernBelle. Offline
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Name: Anna
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Need a counselor, mom's not getting me one, and a whole bunch of other issues. - November 6th 2013, 06:34 PM

I'm dying. Not really, but it feels like it.

First off, I'm getting overweight. I have a complete lack of energy, and this huge knot is developing in my lymph node. I eat grains, and I have mental breakdowns when I start getting hungry for more of them. I'm pretty sure I have body dysmorphia, or maybe it's just the fact that I'm a perfectionist, and I'm going nuts because I can't make my body as perfect as I'd like it to be. My family is always encouraging me to eat and offering me food. The irony is that I won't eat in front of them, but I binge when I'm alone. Thank goodness it's only fruit and vegetables.

Then there's my little brother. I'm going nuts because of him. I have misophonia - in other words, a severe dislike of small sounds, which in severe cases even extends to a dislike of certain sights that drive me bonkers. As much as I try, I can't stop yelling at my brother when he starts chewing food or fidgeting. He does both constantly. He has no table manners. He asks questions constantly. If I play with him one second, he expects me to play with him all day. It's gotten so bad that just seeing my little brother is a trigger for a horde of nasty emotions: Disgust, anger, rage, frustration, and above all an overwhelming urge to run away from him as fast as I can. My parents try to make me talk to him, but honest to goodness, I can't bear his presence. I usually hide in my room when he's home.

I need a counselor for all of this, but because I'm not going around crying and weeping and throwing an "oh-woe-is-me" party, my mom ignores it. I've told her periodically throughout the past year that if she expects my relationship with her and my little brother and my body to improve, I'm going to need a counselor. She "really tried" to get me one, and they "never picked up the phone". Yet my sister has the slightest difficulty at school, and she gets a counselor within the week, even though she doesn't want one.

I'm going bonkers. I'm overreacting, and I feel like sleeping at the same time. I feel like if I could just get out of this house, I'd feel a ton better, but that's impossible until I go hiking next year, because I vetoed going to college and decided to go hiking for six months instead. I'm dead set on that. I just wish I was gone already.

Anna's Personal Keys to Happiness
1. Do what you want within the bounds of reason, whenever you want to, and regret nothing. 2. If you have an opinion, don't beat around the bush, or there isn't a point in saying it. 3. Don't keep the company of anyone who won't like you and will try to change you.

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Chris Offline
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Name: Chris
Age: 24
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Re: Need a counselor, mom's not getting me one, and a whole bunch of other issues. - November 7th 2013, 03:57 AM

Hi there Anna.

I'm sorry to hear about the situation you're in. First off, I know how you feel about the whole eating thing. When I was a bit younger, all I did was eat in excessive amounts, which lead to me reaching an unhealthy stage. Luckily, I had my family force me to start working out, and to start eating healthier. I thank them for it often.

In regards to the whole brother thing; I wish I could help you out and make him stop being 'annoying' (I think that is the right word for it; well, atleast when it comes to food from what you described). While I think it's great to pull yourself out of the situation so you don't blow a casket, I also warn against isolating yourself under such conditions. Doing so can, and eventually will, have a negative impact on your personal relationships with both him (your brother), and possibly the rest of your family.

Overall, I think that having a counselor in your life would be a great idea. What I would do, is search online for nearby counselors, print them out, and call them personally and ask how much their rate is (per hour), where they're located, if they take your particular insurance, and any other relevant questions you may have. Then, write them all down, and present them to your mom. Doing this will not only put pressure on her, but will also make her excuse of 'they didn't answer' disappear, because you had already talked to them. Hopefully after you present such a list to her, she will begin to take the initiative to get you some support/help.

I hope things work out in your favor, Anna.

Best wishes,

I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
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