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kfmendoza Offline
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Unhappy Mom ruins my self esteem - December 28th 2013, 03:39 AM

Ever since I was smaller my mom would always jokingly call me ugly and fat because in all honestly, I was fat and not so good looking. But now I'm 16 and she still tells me so many mean thinks and laughs it off and I don't think she understands that it really hurts me. I mean I'm at the point where I can't take it anymore. All my friends, bf, and some cousins know this because I always tell them about this issue with my feelings. It gets to me really bad and constantly has me crying myself to sleep. She says I'm ugly and when people say I'm pretty they're in fact lying and she always compliments every girl cousin of mine but me and I hate it. I thought mothers were supposed to be loving but all she does is wreck me. I don't know what to do? It's so hard to just shrug off what a mom tells you.
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teenager149 Offline
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Re: Mom ruins my self esteem - December 28th 2013, 03:55 AM

Well, that's a pretty tough situation. Honestly, not all parents can be loving and caring to their kids. They sometimes misunderstand ourselves, and yell at us because of their stress level and such. Just accept that no parent in this world is perfect. After all, she probably doesn't know how much you hate it when she calls you names.
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Re: Mom ruins my self esteem - December 28th 2013, 04:03 AM

Hey there! Welcome to the site .

I'm really sorry that you have to deal with this. Have you tried talking to your mom about what she does? I think it's a good idea to sit down with her and tell her how you are feeling. Find a time when she's not busy and you can be alone together. Mention that the things she says to you really hurt and tell her that you'd appreciate it if she would stop. I'm sure your mom just doesn't realize what she's doing to you and she would probably stop if you told her.

You do not deserve to be treated this way. Remember- you are beautiful.

Find your light in a new dawn.

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Chris Offline
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Re: Mom ruins my self esteem - December 29th 2013, 01:56 AM

Hi there.

I'm really sorry to hear about the situation you have been in. To me, it sounds like this may be stemming from a lack of communication in your relationship with your mother. Have you told your mom (without laughing, and on a very serious note) that you feel bad about yourself when she makes comments like that? Have you truly sat down with her face-to-face and expressed your feelings about her verbal abuse? Unfortunately that's what this is - a form of verbal abuse. Sure, it may be moderate verbal abuse, but it's still abuse nonetheless.

I think now is the time that you talk to her about things. If after having a very serious conversation with her she still refuses to cease the verbal abuse, then I think it's best to talk to a school counselor or social worker. If you are unsure who that is in your school, you can ask a teacher and/or principal where that person is located and that you would like to talk to them about some personal issues. The main goal that you need to have is to find some way (i.e., a solution) that will stop the verbal abuse. So keep that goal in mind when communicating with your mom and/or a school counselor/social worker.

Stay strong, my friend.

Best wishes,

I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
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