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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Lindsey98 Offline
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Name: Lindsey
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My sister boy obsessed - January 7th 2014, 09:31 PM

My sister spends all her time in her room talking to boys. As I am typing right now she's skypeing some guy from Texas. Well I'm tired of not spending time with my sister. I want to spend as much time with her as possible because she goes back to college in a week and then I can't see her. I learned how precious time was when my friend lost her sister who was the same age as mine. She kicks me out of her room every time I go in there and try to just talk to her. She usually sends me away because she's texting guys. I'm really tired of it and I want know my sister and become bestfriends but all she does is shut me out. I don't know what to do.. Help!
   
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Re: My sister boy obsessed - January 8th 2014, 03:17 AM

Hi there, Lindsey.

Interacting with siblings is a very challenging task, especially when those siblings are far in age. Unfortunately, texting has its positives and negatives. You see the negatives (i.e., she's ignoring you), while your sister sees the positives (i.e., she gets to talk to boys). I think that majority of the problem comes from a miscommunication between the two. She may be viewing your attempts to talk to her as being annoying or trying to get in the way of her talking to guys; but in reality you just want to spend time with her.

I think it's time you tell her how you feel. Ask her if she has a minute, and release all your thoughts and feelings toward the subject. Tell her that you rarely see her, and when you do, she's always preoccupied with something else. Tell her that you truly want to spend time with her before she goes back to school. If you don't think you can have this conversation person-to-person, then write her a letter and slip it under her door. Remember to be sincere, and not come across as angry or mad as that will defeat the purpose of the letter/conversation, and may possibly cause an argument.

I hope things work out for the best and that she is able to spend quality time with you before she heads back to school. Remember, communication (verbal or written) is the key to solving this issue.


Best wishes,
Chris


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
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Re: My sister boy obsessed - January 8th 2014, 03:24 AM

Thanks for your advice.
   
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Re: My sister boy obsessed - January 13th 2014, 09:32 PM

What does Sis' most favourite eats? Offer to take her to a diner, even pay for a good steak and chips and a milshake or whatever she wants. If she asks why, just tell her you're going to be missing her soon and what's to stop her from eating whatever she wants, cos you're going to pay. Which you are if you want to get somewhere.

That's what I did to Iona, one of my sisters. We had a bowl of chips first which was an icebreaker. I started doing small talk, noticing she was relaxing. by the end of the meal and me 20 lighter in pocket, we were best friends.



   
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Re: My sister boy obsessed - January 15th 2014, 05:31 AM

I don't know if your sister is truly obsessed or not but this sounds like a tough situation. My advice would be to talk to her. Explain that you know she's going away soon so you'd like to spend some time with her, because she can keep chatting with guys when she's away but you have so little time together. Don't accuse her and don't sound judgemental, just be nice about it and don't start an argument or escalate things. She'll probably understand. If she doesn't there's still a chance that she might try to do something that means a lot to you.

I like the advice of trying to make plans with her. Inviting her to dinner sounds good as does going somewhere like the movies, a fair, whatever is going on in your area. You could try to have a movie marathon with her or just ask her to hang out.

Let us know how it goes!
   
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