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It is hard to stay humble. :( - February 14th 2014, 03:18 AM

One of the most important lessons I have learned is to stay humble. However, I'm recently finding that to be really hard.

My parents always nag at me for "chewing my food too loudly" or "giving unpleasant looks all the time." And whenever that happens, I always keep my calm, even though I get a little enraged in the inside. However, at times, I just can't keep my feeling inside and yell at them, and, of course, we would have a small argument because of that.

I see that they are telling me to do so because they want to discipline me, and I also see that I have to obey them and make sure to correct my wrongdoings. It's just that it's extremely hard for me to do so.

Is this my fault or what?
   
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Re: It is hard to stay humble. :( - February 14th 2014, 07:53 AM

It's natural to get annoyed if the small details of how you act are constantly chastised. You can't completely control how you look at someone entirely unless if you constantly have a third person view of your face, so you're not really at fault imo. As for the chewing food too loudly, I can completely relate to that; my father would yell at me from across the room if I made even the smallest noise from chewing, although he gave up on doing that.




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Re: It is hard to stay humble. :( - February 14th 2014, 11:04 PM

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Originally Posted by Corrupted View Post
It's natural to get annoyed if the small details of how you act are constantly chastised. You can't completely control how you look at someone entirely unless if you constantly have a third person view of your face, so you're not really at fault imo. As for the chewing food too loudly, I can completely relate to that; my father would yell at me from across the room if I made even the smallest noise from chewing, although he gave up on doing that.
Haha yep. My dad would yell at me for making a little noise
   
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Re: It is hard to stay humble. :( - February 15th 2014, 11:50 PM

In my personal opinion it sounds like your parents are picking at you because they can't accept you for the little faults I expect even they did in their very own youth. You can't help chewing loudly and you can't help how you look at people, especially if you do them without thinking. You're just being yourself. The fault lies with them for being so picky in their expectations.

What you could do if you haven't already is sit down with one or both of them and explain that you understand they dislike you doing those things but they're just a part of who you are, that you're trying your best for them but they're not making you feel good by picking at such trivial things. Make sure you keep calm and be understanding of anything they explain to you, shouting doesn't solve problems, it only creates them. If you think you could get annoyed or if you think talking isn't best for you, you could consider writing a letter addressed to one or both of them or even an email. Sometimes writing things down is better because it allows you to think before you actually 'say' them. Creating drafts can also be a good way to help you find the best method of expression while removing any harshness out of whatever you're writing at the same time.


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Re: It is hard to stay humble. :( - February 16th 2014, 03:20 AM

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Originally Posted by OnTides View Post
In my personal opinion it sounds like your parents are picking at you because they can't accept you for the little faults I expect even they did in their very own youth. You can't help chewing loudly and you can't help how you look at people, especially if you do them without thinking. You're just being yourself. The fault lies with them for being so picky in their expectations.

What you could do if you haven't already is sit down with one or both of them and explain that you understand they dislike you doing those things but they're just a part of who you are, that you're trying your best for them but they're not making you feel good by picking at such trivial things. Make sure you keep calm and be understanding of anything they explain to you, shouting doesn't solve problems, it only creates them. If you think you could get annoyed or if you think talking isn't best for you, you could consider writing a letter addressed to one or both of them or even an email. Sometimes writing things down is better because it allows you to think before you actually 'say' them. Creating drafts can also be a good way to help you find the best method of expression while removing any harshness out of whatever you're writing at the same time.
Well, I know that they tell me not to do these things because they are not "good manners." I'll definitely keep this in mind, though.
Thanks for the help


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Re: It is hard to stay humble. :( - February 28th 2014, 10:21 AM

I can say if you parents want you to do then do it. Your duty is to make your parents happy and tension free. Try this for a once for only your parents.
   
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