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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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friggin leave me alone.. - September 15th 2014, 11:51 PM

wow. i just can't get a moment alone in this house, can i??
last school year, there was one day of the week where my mom worked, so i would always be home first, before everyone else.
but of course, my brother had to ruin that one day, so now i'll never have that day alone. he'll always be in the way.

last night, i had some plans.
my brother freaking came into my room and fell asleep on the floor, without even asking if he could.
plans = ruined.

and i don't have a lock on my door or anything, so i can't even change my clothes without standing right next to the door. i used to change next to my closet, in front of the mirror, so i could see how the outfit looked. but my family always barged in on me, and still does.
it's like no one has any effing respect for me and my privacy.

i think that teenagers especially need to be allowed a LOT of space from their family, because if i still think of my family like this by the time i move out, they sure as hell can't count on me showing up for family gatherings or anything.
but it's like, i'm never able to get a moment alone. sometimes even when i'm in the bathroom or showering, my brothers will keep knocking on the door to make me hurry up or to tell me something that can't friggin wait until after i'm done. -.-
i'm really sick of it all.

any advice on how to get away from these people and just get like thirty minutes to and hour for myself?? it's not like i can just go anywhere else...


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Re: friggin leave me alone.. - September 16th 2014, 01:58 AM



Hey, Jess. I'm sorry to hear that you feel like you're not getting any time to yourself and i agree with you, sometimes we need a break from families and friends and have alone time, with no interruptions.

I know how you feel, my house is very crowded, over populated one might say and i do not get any space to myself either, that goes a little more in depth, but that's a story for another day. Everything is rushed and becomes stressful.

I don't really know any more about your situations with family or anything, so my general advice is to why not ask for more privacy? maybe ask to get a lock on your door, or find an activity that involves outside of the house?

If you haven't tried speaking up about this - You should, everyone should respect eachothers privacy, family, age or whatever, everyone is entitled to privacy, especially seeing as it's frustrating that you're plans and daily schedules are littered with random events of...brothers sleeping on floors and the like.

I can only really offer you advice to speak up and possibly vent your frustration to your brother, you don't have to sound disrespectful, because as you say, teenagers just sometimes need to be teenagers and not always swarmed around, or having to feel suspense every time you hear footsteps outside your door.

   
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Re: friggin leave me alone.. - September 16th 2014, 10:12 AM

Hey there,

It must be so frustrating to have little time to yourself!

I think communication is the key. Did you tell your brother that you had plans that night when he fell asleep on your floor? If you didn’t, then he might not have realised. If you did, then it was a bit rude of him to do that, but you next time you could try reminding him that you have plans.

I also know what it’s like to not have a lock on your door when trying to get changed. Is it possible to get a lock, or ask for one? This may sound a little childish, but you know the door hangers you can get (or even print out)? You could try using one of them on your door when you are getting changed.

It is also natural that teenagers want to spend more time doing other things, away from the family. Your teenage years are about finding yourself and starting to become independent ready for adulthood. That said, I think you should talk to your family about how you feel and also when you make plans, so that everyone is aware of what’s happening, so they shouldn’t disturb you as much.

We all need to get away sometimes. For me, I like to go to a café or just go for a walk around the park. But you could “escape” by reading, listening to music, hanging out with friends, or taking up a hobby.

Hope I helped a bit
   
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