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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Question Advice Please? - October 17th 2014, 04:12 AM

Someone I see as a friend recently told me I could never be one of their friends. This person treats me well and we hang out. We act like friends so does it matter what they see me as? Or is the important thing how they treat me?
   
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Re: Advice Please? - October 17th 2014, 01:21 PM

I think both matter. I mean, I can be polite to someone but never have the desire to get to know them out of the context that I am required to know them. This person might just be an acquaintance to you. Acquaintances aren't bad to have, just don't expect more than what you are already getting out of the relationship you have with them.

I wouldn't really stress over this person never considering you as a friend. He/she is one person among many. Has this person continued being nice to you or has that all stopped? Either way, my recommendation is to kill them with kindness, just not too much kindness. Sometimes people get intimidated by someone who is overwhelmingly nice.

Good luck to you! If you ever need to talk, I'm good at listening!


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Unhappy Re: Advice Please? - October 18th 2014, 06:42 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Adalia Rose View Post
I think both matter. I mean, I can be polite to someone but never have the desire to get to know them out of the context that I am required to know them. This person might just be an acquaintance to you. Acquaintances aren't bad to have, just don't expect more than what you are already getting out of the relationship you have with them.

I wouldn't really stress over this person never considering you as a friend. He/she is one person among many. Has this person continued being nice to you or has that all stopped? Either way, my recommendation is to kill them with kindness, just not too much kindness. Sometimes people get intimidated by someone who is overwhelmingly nice.

Good luck to you! If you ever need to talk, I'm good at listening!
Yeah she just doesn't seem like an acquaintance. She confides in me, tell me secrets, spend time with just me (no other friends around), makes an effort to talk to me, hugs me, asks me if I'm ok. All these friendlike things yet she doesn't see me as a friend. I don't get it.
   
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Re: Advice Please? - October 18th 2014, 09:11 AM

I think that people can say things that they don't mean to, but i think that you can still talk to her more. I just get the feeling that she wasn't in a happy moment at that moment and might have said something that she didn't mean. But its kind of hurtful.. i'll admit.
This is something a friend should never say to another friend.

was this friend going through a rough spot lately ? some people have trouble controlling their words when they're overthinking things.


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You guys deserve to be happy no matter what.. okay? You people are a bunch of lovelies ... and no matter what, you people deserve to be happy.
   
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Re: Advice Please? - October 18th 2014, 11:48 AM

They both matter. If she's not willing to be your friend, then your friendship would be a toxic one. You would be a friend to her, but she would not be one for you, and I really just think you'd end up feeling bad. :/

I agree with the person above that maybe you should talk to her. She might not have meant it that way!

PM me if you would like to talk!

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