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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Hide The Scars Offline
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Name: Kaydence
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My dad? - May 8th 2009, 04:45 AM

I'm kind of at the end of my rope I guess, I don't know what to do about my dad anymore. He drinks pretty much all day and he yells at everyone. Today he yelled at my brother and his friend for no reason and he ended up going home early because of that.
He won't listen to anyone else, you can't reason or have a civilized conversation with him. It's always the way he sees things, and more often than not that seems to be a bit warped. My doctor keeps telling us to go to family therapy but he won't have any of that, because our family is so perfect and going to therapy would be just like him admitting something just might be wrong.
I really do wonder what's going through his head all the time, because no matter how hard I try to play it out it makes absolutely no sense to me at all. He also keeps forgetting things, like he'll forget the same thing and repeat it to us many times during the day, and then the next day and the day after that. It's also like he has no social skills at all, he has only one friend pretty much, he comes home every day from work to just complain about how stupid his coworkers are and how much better he is and how everyone is always depending on him.
And when he's at home he always tells me, my mom, and my brother that we never do anything to help, when in reality we all help out as much as we can, it's just that whenever any of us asks him if he needs any help with something that he's doing he yells at us so we just leave him alone.

I really don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore, it's really starting to get to me, and I'm sure it's getting to the rest of the family too.
   
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Re: My dad? - May 8th 2009, 03:12 PM

Do you think it would be a good thing for you to go to family therapy and are you disappionted your dad won't go?

It is difficult because not everyone always wants to talk about their problems but its good to see that you do as I think its important not to bottle things up if they are bothering you. Does your mum and brother feel the same way as you? Do they know how you feel?
   
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Re: My dad? - May 9th 2009, 12:10 AM

Hi Kaydence,

It sounds like your dad is really frustrating for the rest of the family to deal with. It's not fair that he's taking his anger out on everyone else and blaming you for not helping out. I think family therapy would definitely help sort out what exactly is wrong and how all of you can work together to solve it.

What I suggest doing is to get your mom and brother on board with the family therapy idea. Have them talk to him about it, especially your mom. Explain what kind of things you would all talk about and why you all think they need to be dealt with. Don't be afraid to tell him exactly how you feel about how he's acting right now. Do you think your mom would be able to convince him about going as well? If not, still try the team effort.

I hope you are able to convince him. I'm sure it would really help your situation. Could you possibly try going just you, your mom, and your brother? Then you could still all talk to a counselor and hopefully get some suggestions.

Nat.


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Re: My dad? - May 21st 2009, 03:45 AM

heyy my name is ashley my dad is the same way like he used to drink all the time and never realized the effect it had on my mom my brothers and brother but we had an intervencion now he has not had a beer in almost two months but he is always mad and flipping out he like stopped going to work nd lost his job and blamed it on the withdrawl and its a compleat lie i have no idea what to do and like i dont know but i just wanted to let you know that im in a simalar place and im new to this website so if you can message me back please do i would like to hear back
   
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