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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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friend driving me nuts! - June 6th 2009, 10:37 AM

Ok I dont really know what to do. I'm studying for my A levels at the moment and my exams are REALLY soon. I'm spending most of my time revising.
I have this friend who keeps phoning and asking me to do things with him. I find him generally quite irritating but at the moment whilst I'm stressed and concentrating on exams, he's irritating me to the point of wanting to hit someone (preferably him). I've tried saying no because i have studying to do, but when he suggests we study together I cant say no.
I feel like a dreadful person for avoiding someone who obviously wants to spend time with me, but I cant help finding them really annoying!
What do i do?
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Re: friend driving me nuts! - June 6th 2009, 09:15 PM

Everyone needs their alone time, especially during times like this. Personally, I can't study properly if I'm with other people. I study much more efficiently on my own. It seems like you're the same way. I could understand how this situation may be difficult for you, especially given your nature - you don't want to hurt his feelings, but you find him a bit irritating, which is understandable.

My advice to you would be to talk to him about it and tell him the truth. It seems like he likes you a lot. There's nothing wrong with that, of course, but that doesn't mean that you should feel obligated to hang out with him whenever he wants. Talk to him, nicely, and explain how you feel. Explain to him that you need to study and these exams are very important to you. Perhaps you can offer to go out with him on the weekend or whenever you're free.

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Re: friend driving me nuts! - June 7th 2009, 04:17 PM

Hi there,

This is a busy time for you, so it's understandable that you need some alone time to study. Some people study better when they are alone- I know I do! Just let your friend know that you are really stressing for exams right now and you need the study time.

I think it's important that you re-schedule a time when you can hang out with your friend. If you give him a set date, then he's less likely to keep phoning you up all the time and asking if you want to hang out. Plan a big day with him when exams are over, and let him know you want to celebrate the end of exams with him. I think it's really nice of him to want to spend so much time with you and it putting in the effort to keep up the calls, but you just need to let him know that you're studying right now, and that you would rather you hang out when you aren't so stressed.

Hopefully he'll understand what you're going through at the moment. Good luck with your exams, and have fun with your friend!


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