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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
thebigmole Offline
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I'm a bit desperate - June 12th 2009, 03:36 AM

Okay so I have this "friend" I say "friend" because well, I'm pretty sure I only hang out with him because I have no one else to hang out with, we're gonna call him DJ. You see I've never been that much of a social person, my one good friend goes to school in Chicago and won't be back for a whole nother week, and I've known DJ since my junior year of high school. We hung out we were good friends, but he was always and still is very immature and very full of himself. My senior year he got it into his head that I was being mean to him. Now he was one of the few people who knew I had a crush on this guy (which was a big mistake telling him on my part, which is sad because you should be able to tell your friends things) another person who knew was a sophmore that was also crushing on the same guy and we had become really good friends. Well sometime after school was done I fouund out that someone had told this guy I liked him and I was just embarrassed by it (especially since I only liked him on account of co-star syndrome, drama department stuff), well DJ told me that the other girl told the guy I liked him. And I was very upset and felt very betrayed and acting immaturely basically made no effort to contact her before she moved away. I wrote to her later in the summer apologizing and explaining why and she told me that she never said anything to the guy. So there it was. Now I took a gap year before college and my father was still very involved in my drama department so I was at the school a lot. And I didn't talk to DJ, I was furious.

So now it's two years later and we still hang out and are "friends" again. But I'm not sure if I really want to continue this friendship. Whenever I'm with him he just talks about how I was a bitch to him in high school, and makes fun of me. So I don't know what to do, on one hand I blame him for ruining a good friendship with someone else and am tired of his personality and his attitude towards me. On the other hand he's the only person that ever asks me to do anything, until this other friend comes home. I lied the other night and told him I couldn't go out when he asked, but some nights I really want to get out I just don't know if it's worth being out with him.


"For Ignorance killed the cat, Curiosity was framed." -Caitlin McGrath

"For this thing we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down." -Mary Pickford

"But the music's so happy!" -Little Sally: Urinetown

"If our own policies aren't supporting equality then what are we fighting for?"- Kathy Griffin
   
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PSY Offline
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Re: I'm a bit desperate - June 12th 2009, 05:20 AM

It's one thing if you aren't a "socialable" person. Believe me, I'm one of them. I'm quite content to spend an entire day by myself, enjoying the privacy and solitude. But to only have two friends? One of which isn't really a "friend", per se, and the other who is gone most of the time due to school?

Why is it that you don't have any other friends? Did you not get along with the other threater students? I'm not trying to be accusatory in my questioning, but I do feel that if you had other people to spend time with, you wouldn't think twice about ditching this guy for good.

I know this much, though, and it's that if someone were to call me a "bitch" every time I hung out with him... well, I'd only be hanging out with him that one time. Period.






   
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Re: I'm a bit desperate - June 13th 2009, 03:13 AM

Well the problem is I mostly got along with people younger than me, so they are still in school and busy with their own lives. Of the seniors from drama my year, well I never really fit in with them, they were big partiers, I tried but all it got me was a crappy part in a play because my director thought I was going to go flaky because I was hanging out with them. Out of the class after me that has graduated, there are these two people and the first college I went to was only 3 hours away from her. Now I did make friends at my first school this year but then I left, so I'm kinda stuck. I just get annoyed by people in general so it takes a rare kind of person that I can stand being around for a good amount of time. It's' my problem and I'm trying to fix it. I'm just afraid I'm going to cause more drama cutting him off, especially since his college is only an hour away from my new one.


"For Ignorance killed the cat, Curiosity was framed." -Caitlin McGrath

"For this thing we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down." -Mary Pickford

"But the music's so happy!" -Little Sally: Urinetown

"If our own policies aren't supporting equality then what are we fighting for?"- Kathy Griffin
   
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