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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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soccer9513 Offline
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Name: kara
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ughhh - June 29th 2009, 07:32 PM

okay so my grandma pretty much stopped loving me and my brother when our cousin was bored. she spends all her time with my cousin and it really bothers us. we barely talk anymore. so last week i tried to get close again and when i went to hang with her she made me take care of my younger cousin while she took care of my older cousin. she went to sleep with barely saying a word to me. i spent 2 hrs in the bathroom crying on the phone to my mom. now she wants me to go to the zoo with her and my two cousins. im going but i think its over with her. does anyone have any advice? please she makes me miserable but shes my grandma. what should i do?
   
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Re: ughhh - June 29th 2009, 07:50 PM

Hey Kara.

It sounds like you were close with your grandmother before she started spending more time with your cousin. I would suggest planning some time alone with your grandmother without your cousin around. This way you can have time without any distraction and just have good light-hearted talk. I think you may be overreacting from that time you did approach her last week. Try approaching her again.

Try to think about it from your older cousin's perspective as well. Perhaps she was feeling lonely and down before your grandmother started spending time with her?

I really think it is possible that you can spend quality time with your grandmother, your brother and your cousins. Perhaps you can find out what your cousin and grandmother do during their times together and find an interest in those activities.

I hope that you and your brother's relationship with your grandmother gets better!
   
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Re: ughhh - June 29th 2009, 07:52 PM

Hi Kara

I can completely understand what you are going through. My grandma (Dads Mum) favours my cousins. And she treats my mum like crap, whereas she loves my aunty, uncle & their kids.
Its obvious, just some of the quirks & what she says just gives it away.

I dont think your grandma has stopped loving you, or your brother, I just think because there is a younger child in the family its easier to control,whereas you and your brother are grown up.

Why dont you try a bonding excersice, just you, your brother and your grandma. No cousins.

Or you could go out together, cousins n' all

I wouldnt take it to heart, I dont think she means it.

But ....I also think you should talk to your parents about how you feel. I did & it made me feel so much better.

My grandma is the kind of grandma that has done it better, seen it better, everything better than everyone else.

If you want to discuss grandparents, then my inbox is always open

Jamie
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