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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Amélie Offline
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Ditched for her boyfriend.. - July 7th 2009, 03:32 AM

My friend and I have been planning on going to this music festival for over a year now.
Its a five day festival and so we need to camp.

We have been planning to camp together the whole time; she had always said she wanted to camp with me, not her boyfriend...

Earlier today I saw her and double checked that she was still camping with me because it had been a while since we talked about it and the festival is in a month. She said she still was.

But, this evening she called me and said that she had just phoned her boyfriend and that he was surprised she wasnt camping with him, and had expected her too... so she asked me if that was fine since he had expected it... I didnt want to be rude or make her feel like she had to camp with me so I said it was okay...

She also said that I could camp next to them but that I would have the tent alone and they would have a tent.. That would be fine.. but I am starting to realize that the whole festival she is probably going to ditch me just like this.. and I'm starting to not really want to go with her.. But I dont have anyone else to go with either..

Its just so annoying since I had checked with her so many times and she had always said she wanted to camp with me and that she definately wouldnt ditch me for him..

I dont know what to do about the festival now..

"Farewells can be shattering, but returns are surely worse. Solid flesh can never live up to the bright shadow cast by its absense."
-Margaret Atwood
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Ditched for her boyfriend.. - July 7th 2009, 04:24 AM


why not sit down and have a talk with her and tell her that it kind of bothers you because you've been planning this for so long and now it feels like she is ditching you and you're worried that this is how the whole festival will turn out. friends usually understand this. maybe you guys could meet in the middle and she could camp with him one day and then you the next, then him, then you, so on and so fouth. [:

when life is in discord; praise ye the Lord

keep your faith alive.
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BeautyKills :O Offline
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Re: Ditched for her boyfriend.. - July 7th 2009, 03:14 PM

I understand what you mean. My bestfriend ditched me for her boyfriend when we were planning to have lunch together and then go shopping. We talked about it though and ever since, she always puts me number one on her schedule before her boyfriend.

As Casie said, you can talk to her about it. Tell her that it bothers you. I'm sure she'll understand that. After all, friends don't ditch each other for guys. Either she camps with you OR take Casie's suggestion

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
— Maya Angelou
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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Ditched for her boyfriend.. - July 7th 2009, 10:31 PM

Definitely bring up your concerns. "Hey So-and-So, I understand that you want to be in your boyfriend's tent overnight because... well, he's your boyfriend, and who wouldn't want to sleep with their boyfriend? But I'm worried that you're going to keep putting him above me during the entire festival... are you just planning to change our sleeping arrangements, or ALL of our arrangements?"

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boyfriend, ditched

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