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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
heylee<3 Offline
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Unhappy i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 05:29 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering by the original poster or by a Moderator. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

So i feel like I always complain to my friends...
I very recently quit cutting and it's really hard to not cut right now after doing it for a year and a half.
I'm also trying to quit drinking and smoking(pot) and it's all very stressful and I talk to my best friend about it a lot. She says she doesn't mind and that she wants to help me because she doesn't want me to get hurt but i feel like she gets tired of it all. But if I don't talk about it it gets so overwhelming and I feel drawn to cut and drink and smoke.
I don't know what to do because I don't want to lose my best friend or make her mad but I don't want to start my bad habits again.
They're always in the back of my mind so it's like a constant battle to not resort back to them.
I need the support of my best friend but I'm so afraid of losing her...
What can I do?
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 01:37 PM

Heya Hayley

First off, what you are doing is so admirable. You are stopping cutting, drinking and smoking all at once. Stopping one of them alone is hard enough, I can't imagine how hard it must be for you. I haven't spoken to you before, but I am proud
As for your friend, to be honest I don't think you should worry. She is your best friend and she said she didn't mind and she would be there for you. Think about it this way, turn the situation around, you would be doing the same thing as she is doing for you and would listen all year long just to keep her safe.
If you are really worried about it, ask her? and ask her to answer you honestly.

PM me anytime you want to talk

Mags
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Hold your head high princess, for tomorrow is another day.

You can do tonight without the help of a blade and wake in the morning with the feeling of accomplishment

PM me anytime, I am always here to be a shoulder to cry on, an ear to hear whats bothering you and words to make you see the hope








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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 01:49 PM

Hi Haylee,

First of all I just wanted to congratulate you on making it a year and a half without self harm. I'm sure that there are tons of people that would look up to you. You definately are strong! Good for you .

As to your issue. I have to say, you definately came to the right place. We all here are willing to help you, you need to keep pulling through, maybe think of something else instead of drinking, smoking and cutting. Your friend I'm pretty sure won't just up and leave. It takes a lot of damage to make someone do that. You could go to her house, and ask her about it. Like Mags said, or if you feel uncomfortable talking about it to her in person, ask her about it over e-mail or something. Just let her know how you are feeling, and that you are worried.

Stay strong, and PM me if you need anything

Brittany



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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
heylee<3 Offline
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Re: i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 05:07 PM

thanks guys

oh and to brittany, i havent been without self harm.
thats how long it went on.
im really about a week without it and everything else.
   
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Re: i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 05:19 PM

Even though its been only a week, it is still a huge accomplishment! be proud of yourself for that and trying to quit. She is your best friend, you are supposed to share things with each other and help. If one of you falls, the other will help the person up. Don't worry, she will be there if she is your best friend. I dont think she wants to see you hurt. And if you feel as though you have nobody to talk to you can always come on here and we will listen
PM me if you need to talk

Theresa

Last edited by smiles_and_such; July 26th 2009 at 05:20 PM. Reason: spelling
   
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Re: i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 06:32 PM

Hi Hayley,

That is still a huge deal, a week is amazing to get to!

Brittany



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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
heylee<3 Offline
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Re: i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 07:14 PM

it feels like a lot more than a week but at the same time it feels like just yesterday. ah idk.
   
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Re: i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 08:36 PM

I can totally relate to that! Just remember that your stronger then before, and you can do anything if you put your mind to it!



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  (#9 (permalink)) Old
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Re: i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 08:51 PM

hey Hayley,
firstly, congratulations on being so strong and stopping cutting, smoking and drinking, as said before, stopping on is hard enough. you have so much strength, i too am proud to know you
your friend said that she doesnt mind and that shell always help you, but if you are still worried, i would tell her about your concerns. be honest with her and ask her to be honest in return. as your friend, im sure she would do anything for you and wouldnt mind in the least for you to ask her.
talking about wanting to smoke, drink and cut is much better than doing it. everyone here is here for you and wishing you the very best. stay strong, you will come out of this and will look back on it one day and wonder how you had the strength to do it, but i know you do have that strength
keep ypur head up and stay strong
PM me if you ever want to talk or to have someone to listen to you
Hannah X


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keep reaching and living your lives. you are who you are.

PM me whenever and ill do my best to help!

Im here if you ever need anyone to talk to or to have someone to listen to you
   
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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Re: i dont wanna lose my best friend... - July 26th 2009, 10:51 PM

thanks everyone.
   
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