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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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phoenixsrmc Offline
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Contacting Ex's Guy Friend - August 7th 2009, 01:55 AM

I've been single for about 2 months now.

I haven't talked to my ex for 2 months.

The sad things is that I miss HIS friends. Apparently there's this silent rule that I can't converse with his friends now because we broke up. I don't like this rule.

There's this one guy that I want to talk to who's my ex's friend ... and I don't have his number and I deleted my facebook (and I don't plan to get it back any time soon) so I don't have any means of talking to him. I haven't talked to him in forever, but we've developed some form of more than acquaintance, less than good friends type relationship. I guess I want to talk to him because he seems the brightest of the bunch and I related to him more ... and I guess I miss him most out of the bunch too. I could get his number through another friend (her number I have) of my ex's.

Would that be a bad move to do ... just ask for his number or some form of contact? I just want to talk to him ... maybe even ask how my ex is doing if the subject comes up. Idk. Ugh ok maybe I have a little crush-let on this guy too ... a form of moving on I guess? ... ugh. Is this a bad sign: me having some feelings for my ex's guy friend?

I just find it irritating that I have to stop being friends with all of my ex's friends because we broke up ...

what should I do?


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Re: Contacting Ex's Guy Friend - August 7th 2009, 02:05 PM

Hey there
very tough situation, personally, i think that enough time has passed and as long as you do it in the open - and not behind your ex's back - then its perfectly alright to get in contact with his friend

i wouldn't advise dating this friend straight away - that would very definantly hurt your ex but just getting into contact shouldn't hurt (too much) it may even provoke him to start communication with you again and you can gain some closure

good luck, your definantly going to need it :P
   
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Re: Contacting Ex's Guy Friend - August 7th 2009, 11:45 PM

You shouldnt have that rule as you can talk to anyone you want too, its not fair if he wont let you talk to his friends but i think you should get in contact with him yes. If it goes any further tell your Ex to so he has time to adjust to it.


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Re: Contacting Ex's Guy Friend - August 8th 2009, 03:25 AM

Hey,

I think if you feel comfortable with this friend then go for it but definitely don't do it behind your ex's back because that could lead to problems. Be open with your ex and explain that you want to talk to his fried (as just friends or what not) I know you shouldn't have to tell your ex when you decide to date/talk to a new guy but given the situation I think talking to your ex, a bit, about it might be a good idea.

Also, making sure that your ex's friend is okay with the situation would be a good idea; just ask him, somehow, if he is comfortable talking to you so that no problems arise.

I hope this helped and good luck.

~Jenna~


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