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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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TheWhiteTornado Offline
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Am I wrong to want others to show that they care? - September 2nd 2009, 03:29 AM

This isn't a rhetorical question, I was just curious as to whether it was my own selfishness to make me want my friends to seem to care or what. I've always seemed to attract the "tough love/get over it/suck it up" kind of reactions from friends when for anyone else they'd immediately go into a panic asking if they were alright. So is this a type of feeling that I should take as a sign of my own selfishness that I should repress or is this just human nature?

"What do we live for, if not to make life less difficult for each other?"
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"Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."
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xxpaigiexx Offline
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Re: Am I wrong to want others to show that they care? - September 2nd 2009, 11:20 AM

Hey Jack,

I think we all like to know that our friends care.
I guess with guys it is a little different, especially when you're friends with mainly guys, guys don't usually like to show they care as much as girls do, girls are usually much more sensitive to each others feelings and more likely to want to talk about it where as guys have a much tougher time speaking about their problems.

Maybe if you've not already got any girls that are friends you should try and make some.
Speaking to girls about problems would probably get you a more wanted response.
Hope this helped
Pm me anytime.
Paige x
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Strider Offline
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Re: Am I wrong to want others to show that they care? - September 2nd 2009, 10:30 PM

Hi Jack,

You are definitely not wrong or selfish for wanting your friends to care about you. As Paige said, I'm sure we all want to know our friends care. It's important to have a connection with your friends and it's always nice to know they get worried and care about what happens to you.

I've found that guys mostly do like to show tough love, but it all depends on the person. From my experience, guys will show that they care if they fully understand what's going on and how much it is affecting a person. It could be that your friends don't understand that you are upset about some things and think it's alright to just step back from it.

Maybe next time they tell you to suck it up, just tell them that whatever happened is really bothering you and it might take you a while to get over it. Or maybe say that you are surprised they don't care about it. After a statement like that, they may snap out of it.

I hope your friends put in more effort into letting you know that they are there for you.

If you ever need to talk, feel free to send me a message any time.


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Everyone has a story. What's yours?
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jellyfish Offline
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Re: Am I wrong to want others to show that they care? - September 2nd 2009, 11:33 PM

No you aren ot wrong for wanting others to show they care.
I'm exactly the same, I either get the 'tough love' or be completely ignored, and it gets so ridiculously frustrating
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