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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
mikaela17 Offline
Welcome me, I'm new!
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Name: mikaela aubrey
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: washington

Posts: 21
Join Date: August 10th 2009

i need help... - September 7th 2009, 06:04 AM

i thought she was my best friend.
i got a boyfriens and she doesnt understand how much i like him.
she says im making bad choices.
i know my risks. i know its not always the best thing.
i get that Kayla, i know!

i have always been helping her through her hard times, and supporting her, she doesnt know what kind of stress that puts on my shoulders. i dont want to be rude, but when she left my school no matter how much i missed her, the stress went away gradually...i sound like a total bitch, but it just happened that way.

it hurts me when she makes bad decisions, and maybe that is the way she feels with my choices too...oh.

maybe being friends with her wasnt meant to be.
its stressful

the stars lean down to kiss you,
i lie awake and miss you.
pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere...
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
savealife723 Offline
i live. i laugh. i love.
I've been here a while
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Age: 24
Gender: girly girl (:
Location: LaLaLand.

Posts: 1,787
Join Date: April 21st 2009

Re: i need help... - September 7th 2009, 06:09 AM

i understand.
and i would never want to put stress on you.

i may not show it well,
but i care about you.

it does hurt me when you make bad decisions.
but i understand why you're doing them.
you're doing them for the same reason i started doing them.
but i know that you're smarter than me,
and won't let it get like that.

i know when i need to let go,
and i see that now is the time.

i just want you to be happy.
and i know elijah makes you happy.
but it's hard to be with all the problems i throw at you.

so i'm sorry.
and you're right.

i'll back off.
i understand mikaela.
it's alright.

God has great things planned for you girl!

When you can't find your way home,
and when life gets too hard to face on your own.
I will stand as a light through the darkness unknown,
I will walk with you, so you're never alone.
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Strider Offline
I've been here a while
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Name: Nat
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: A broken glass picture

Posts: 1,448
Join Date: January 19th 2009

Re: i need help... - September 7th 2009, 02:47 PM

Hi Mikaela,

It sounds like you feel as if you need to choose either your boyfriend or your friend in this situation, but I don't think that is the only way to go. You should be allowed to spend time with your boyfriend and your friend, without one taking precedence over the other. I know you care about your boyfriend, but it also sounds like you care about your friend, and that is something you need to take into consideration.

Another thing you should probably think about is whether or not you are in a healthy relationship. If you and your boyfriend both love and care for each other, then one should not be putting the other in dangerous situations. I don't know the details of the situations you are being put in, but I think you need to think about this very carefully. Your boyfriend- or anyone else, for that matter- should not be putting you at risk. Sometimes it is better to be a little selfish in these situations- YOU need to take care of YOURSELF. And that includes making sure you are safe in whatever you do.

It sounds like your friend cares about you a lot. Maybe you should sit down and have a talk with her about this. Find a way to compromise by spending some time with your boyfriend and some time with your friend. It is good to stay social even while in a relationship, so tossing aside a friendship for a relationship with your boyfriend is not the best idea. Keep up the communication and make sure you make time for yourself as well as other people.

Take care.

The great artists of our time are the ones who created something timeless. But it was never them defining it that way.
Everyone has a story. What's yours?
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