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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Friend? - December 23rd 2009, 09:57 PM

So, I recently made friends with this guy and for a while it was really good. I mean, we talked about a lot. I told him everything about myself and he didn't run away or anything.

I told him that I had an Eating Disorder, that I used to cut, etc and he just told me that I was a good person and that didn't effect our friendship (this was on halloween).

Things were going really good and then on November 21 (my birthday)we were hanging out and he planned a party and such for me. Well, after the party we went back to my place and (sadly) we smoked a little weed (I only do this on special occasions) and I ended up having a breakdown.

The reason I broke down was because I was dealing with a lot at the time. I had jsut remembered that I had been molested by my neighbor and his wife and I hadn't completely come to terms with it. Smoking pot didn't help because I was so emotional and it led to more of an emotional breakdown.

Well, him and his friend (who was there too ) ended up leaving and they ended up calling my dad so that I wouldn't be alone and because (I think) he was worried about me.

I was kind of flipped out about it and I thought 'great I pushed him away' but we ended up texting and he said it was fine and he believed in me etc.

So I was reassured that things were okay between us etc.

Recently though he has gotten into a relationship with someone (the same friend that was there that night) and he hasn't been hanging around as much. Which is understandable because when people are in 'lust' or trying out a new thing they tend to focus on that. But, I have texted him 2-3x in the past couple of weeks. I text him once a week just to say something along the lines of 'hey, I hope your day is going good' or 'I was just thinking of you and so I thought I would text you and say hi. Hope your day is going good.' I don't think I over do the texting or anything. I will only text him once in the week just to say hi and then I will leave it at that. But, the problem is that he hasn't responded to 2 or three of my texts. So, I am beginning to wonder if maybe he doesn't really want to be my friend anymore.

The thing is that I would talk to him about it but I don't want to sound paranoid. I mean, I just don't know.

And then I am wondering if I am texting him way too much but I mean once a week isn't that bad considering the fact that we are friends (I have friends I text more than that) So, I just don't know what to do I guess. It kind of bothers me that he sometimes doesn't text me back but he is dealing with a relationship so a part of me thinks that could be it but than there is a voice in the back of my mind saying 'it doesn't take much to text back and say 'hi' or something.

And, the times that I have texted him and he responded his replies were kind of generic, they didn't seem like him. But at the same time when you text someone sometimes the responses can seem 'generic' or what not.

So, I guess I am just needing to vent and some advice would be good. I know asking him about it would be the best thing to do but I really don't know how to come about it and I don't want him to think that I am hanging on him or something. I mean, he is a great friend and I have been trying to respect the fact that he is in a relationship but idk does that mean he can't take 5 seconds to text me back??

Blah Idk I guess I am just confused because I really don't want to blow things between us by implying he is being a bad friend etc but idk.....

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Re: Friend? - December 23rd 2009, 10:22 PM

Maybe it's just a lot for him to take in you know, My friends weren't used to all my problems and couldn't really help as they'd never been through the same thing, just give him some time, try talking to him and he should come around.

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