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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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hasletgo Offline
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i hate her. - May 12th 2010, 12:36 PM

I hate my best friend. I just can't deal with her anymore. She's changed. Back when we were kids, we were inseparable. Now that we're teenagers, nothing. She hangs out with her cool friends. She tells them everything but she tells me that I'll always be on the top of her list. I confronted her about this and all she said was that it was a compromise. She's ditched me too many times and it just hurts a lot. When I needed her, she wasn't there. When she needed me, I always tried, but she ended up criticizing me. I can't anymore. She's like a sister to me..but I don't know how to let her go. It's really hard for me. I'm not clingy, but all I have is her. I can't talk to anyone else.


I just really need to vent.
   
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Re: i hate her. - May 12th 2010, 01:25 PM

its alright honey, sometimes we just need to talk, and someone to listen. <3
kinda dealing with the same thing here, check out my post, its like 2 below yours.
i know its not want you want to hear, but if she's treating you lke that then she probably isn't a friend!! same thing happened to me couple of years ago. going into high school my best friend was a girl called Robin, but after a few weeks she made a whole bunch of new shiny pretty friends, who didn't like me. we talked about it, me and herand in the end it turned out that she would rather be popular and in with them than keep me as a friend. we still talk, but we're no where near as close as we were. its sad, but these things happen.

im sorry.

<3
   
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Re: i hate her. - May 13th 2010, 05:44 AM

Unfortunately this happens to almost everyone at a certain time. You go on with life and enjoy it. And always be good to her : so that you can be a good person. Don't treat her bad but if she comes talking to you as if you nothing happened inform her that you just can't do it anymore and she only hurts you. But go on with life and slowly you shall begin to find new friends. But forgive her.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.

Last edited by Jacksonian; May 13th 2010 at 05:45 AM. Reason: addition
   
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Re: i hate her. - May 13th 2010, 06:23 AM

^i second that. people who just move on w/o forgiving because they a)dont think they need too. b) dont want to. find it harder in the long run to get over people. but if you forgive and forget you will be happy with your choice.


" One day at a time, this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering. "

i wonder when i'll finally jsut start accepting myself, when i'll stop saying i wish i could be like that person.

i have facebook, and myspace. and you can ask for it. :P
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Re: i hate her. - May 13th 2010, 06:45 AM

I know, first hand, how difficult it is to be in a friendship like this one. In eighth grade I was struggling a lot with depression, and a friend of mine didn't seem to understand this. I wasn't a great friend for awhile there due to my struggles, and she decided that she'd move on and start talking to other people and completely ignoring me all together. She didn't see anything wrong with this, and still feels like she had justification for her actions.

We're on speaking terms now, but I still wouldn't really call us friends. The one thing I regret, though, is leaving the friendship angry. I said hurtful things, and now when I look back I can honestly say that I was not a nice person when she did this to me. If you feel that moving on from this friendship is the best thing to do, then don't let anything stop you from doing so. But don't move on from it angrily. You'll regret your actions that way.

Talk things through calmly with your friend, let her know how you feel and that you simply cannot take the way she is treating you any longer. Assure her that you value the friendship you have with her, but that things have started to change and it's really started to get to you. Let her know that you're willing to work on your friendship, but only if she's willing to change her actions.

If she's not, then you know what you have to do. It's not easy to leave a friend behind, but you need to look out for yourself. Holding on to a hurtful friendship simply because it's hard to walk away is never the solution. Don't be angry with her, and don't start a fight with her or anything like that. Walk away calmly. That's always the best way to end things, and the easiest way to move on.

Good luck. Everything will be okay!





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
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