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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Pour the Teapot Offline
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At the edge - September 19th 2010, 01:41 AM

I can't stand it anymore. My mom has pushed me to my limit. It's like she's abusing a puppy because there's NOTHING I can do! I told her that she had pushed me too far, and all she did was ask me if I was f***ing suicidal! I can't stand it! I really don't want to leave (home), but I'm telling you I'm at my edge. Something has to be done or I am going to lose it! I can't stand this at all! I don't even know what keeps me sane any more! Anyone else would have cracked by now! And I will if something doesn't change soon! Please somebody help me!
   
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Re: At the edge - September 19th 2010, 06:55 PM

Ok, hon. I looked you up and read about some of the things your mum does, and it looks like your relationship is terrible right now, but that's ok, because things like this happen and there are people like her in the world that you will occasionally have to deal with.

Let me first tell you what I thought about your mum. Obviously, this is all interpretation, but I think she honestly does care about you. With the things that have happened, she is probably feeling quite helpless. She doesn't know how to help you and everything she does seems to make things worse. What she thinks will help clearly doesn't and she can't figure out what you want her to do. When she asks if you're suicidal, or asks if you might be depressed, it's because she cares about you. Try to remember that, even if what she says is infuriating.

The key is communication and calmness. You need to tell her what she is doing wrong and how she can help you. Tell her when she does something that offends or upsets you, and even if she does it again, keep your cool and remind her what you said. Losing your temper with her won't ever help. You're obviously strong to make it this far, but remember that leaving her or trying to go on with how things are won't make things better between you. Use your strength and confidence, and work through your problems. Ask her to tell you why she jumps to the worst conclusions. The answer might surprise you.
If she refuses to communicate, again, stay calm. Explain to her that she is making you unhappy. Tell her you want to get on with her and work with her for your benefit. She won't be enjoying seeing you go through this, and make sure she knows that it will help you massively if things are right between you. Get support from anyone you can.

I hope this helped. If it didn't, tell me where I was going wrong and I'll try again
r&r x


Have a free hug.


Why be stingy? Take another.


It's gonna be okay.

Last edited by razors_and_rosary; September 19th 2010 at 07:14 PM. Reason: expanding reply
   
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Re: At the edge - September 19th 2010, 07:05 PM

[Edited]

I know it's hard to live with your parents sometimes, and they can make your life hell but you just have to get used to it and try and live with it until you are old enough to leave home. I know I've had to do that. By what you said, your mother only asked you a question, which seemed like she cared about you. Maybe you can explain why that was such a bad thing, and what you're so upset over?




Last edited by PSY; September 20th 2010 at 06:53 PM. Reason: Response to removed content.
   
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Re: At the edge - September 19th 2010, 08:06 PM

I've tried talking to her calmly so many times. But as soon as I start crying (which is unavoidable because of the meds) she refuses to listen. I can't take this anymore, crying every day, getting my hopes up and having them smashed down, all the emotional abuse. My moms telling me that there's a place I can go some weekends, but I don't want to go some weekends! I need to live somewhere else! I can't stand it any more it's getting harder and harder to keep it together.
   
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