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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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How to tell a guy friend you're not comfortable being in his dorm room? - November 9th 2010, 03:39 AM

Alright, so I've got this friend at school, and he's completely and totally 100% awesome. So I feel bad saying it, but I'd be really uncomfortable being in his dorm room with him. Like just now, he invited me to come play Black Ops with him after class tomorrow.

It's not that I don't trust him or anything. It's just that, well . . . sometimes I trust people a little too much, and it gets me into bad situations. I don't want to just come out and say "Look, you're a big guy. If you decided you wanted to rape me there would be nothing I could do about it, so no, I don't want to hang out in your room." But at the same time I feel bad making up excuses. How do I tell him it makes me uncomfortable without sounding like I don't trust him?

Thanks for opinions/advice in advance.


and if you should hear the cries and calls
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don't you get yourself so blue
it's just the sound of me getting over you
   
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Re: How to tell a guy friend you're not comfortable being in his dorm room? - November 10th 2010, 01:25 AM

In such a situation(and there may be others too) you just have to say it as gently as you can but it will still cause some hurt. An example of gently saying it is :

-Hey, i'm just gonna stay in my room(or go to my friends room/or go somewhere else).

You don't have to tell him the reason, but you can also just say no gently.
An example :
-> No. I'm just gonna stay in my room(or go somewhere else).

If he is a good guy then he will understand. And you can go on with your life.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
   
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Re: How to tell a guy friend you're not comfortable being in his dorm room? - November 10th 2010, 06:21 AM

I explained to him I was uncomfortable being in someone's room alone, because of bad previous experiences. He told me to stop worrying so much, gave me a "rape whistle," and we had a good time playing Black Ops. I guess I was worried over nothing. Thanks for the advice though.


and if you should hear the cries and calls
through the thinnest of the walls
don't you get yourself so blue
it's just the sound of me getting over you
   
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Re: How to tell a guy friend you're not comfortable being in his dorm room? - November 10th 2010, 10:29 AM

LOL rape whistle

I remember those. My very first girlfriend brought one to our first date. She didn't have to use it though and we loled about it in the future
   
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Re: How to tell a guy friend you're not comfortable being in his dorm room? - November 10th 2010, 03:54 PM

I'm glad you got things sorted out! Atleast he was nice enough to make you feel reassured



   
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