TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Taeson Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Taeson's Avatar
 
Name: Brittany
Age: 26
Gender: Female

Posts: 8
Join Date: March 29th 2011

Unhappy what to do - March 30th 2011, 12:54 AM

My real father is an alcoholic. He did bad things to my mom, two brothers and me. She finally got a divorce and married another man. My father broke me in a way that i can barely trust anybody especially guys. My stepdad and i hardly get along and i don't know what to do. i'm afraid to talk to him about anything and i dont like him going many places with me. I don't know what is wrong with me that I do that. I dont mean to. I want a healthy relationship with him but i feel like my real dad messed me up. Even though my real dad is not in my life anymore he has still managed to affect me even though he is not here. I have a hard time getting along with people especially men. My stepdad says that i have anger for my real dad and i take it out on him but i dont. I love my stepdad and all but I try to get along with him but I seem to fail. Does anybody know what to do?
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
ARootlessTree Offline
ಠ_ಠ
Regular TeenHelper
*****
 
ARootlessTree's Avatar
 
Name: Toz
Age: 26
Gender: Male
Location: Virginia

Posts: 462
Join Date: May 28th 2009

Re: what to do - March 30th 2011, 02:11 AM

Hiya Brittany,

Are you close with your mom? If you are, you should consider asking her to go to group therapy with you and your stepfather. I would also consider getting therapy for what had happened between you and your father. Hang tough, I know things are hard now, but I promise they will pick up.
Toz


_______________________________________________
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Taeson Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Taeson's Avatar
 
Name: Brittany
Age: 26
Gender: Female

Posts: 8
Join Date: March 29th 2011

Re: what to do - March 30th 2011, 04:27 AM

My mom and I are not super close but we are ok... i hardly ever see her.. My real dad lives in another state and i never want to see him again. I havent thought of group therapy.
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
evans_x Offline
Just a whisper in the wind ..
Not a n00b
**
 
evans_x's Avatar
 
Name: Kayla
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Location: Australia

Posts: 69
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: November 7th 2010

Re: what to do - March 30th 2011, 05:17 AM

Sounds as if your stepfather understands which is a good thing It's often hard to get on with a step parent, I have a step father and I barely communicate with him. I don't know my real dad so I consider my step dad my real one.
Just open up to him a little and show that you do care, it's just that your real father has made it hard for you to get along with other men now. He'll understand, he'll probably actually feel happy that his step daughter is talking to him Even if it's a short and simple talk like, how was your day? & with time, you can work on bonding with him. It definitely isn't an overnight thing, it takes time and patience.
  Send a message via Yahoo to evans_x Send a message via Skype™ to evans_x 
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Taeson Offline
Member
Welcome me, I'm new!
*
 
Taeson's Avatar
 
Name: Brittany
Age: 26
Gender: Female

Posts: 8
Join Date: March 29th 2011

Re: what to do - April 5th 2011, 02:31 AM

Its very hard to talk to him because he is a man. ive been hurt by many men and it is hard to trust or even do anything with them. I'm trying to find a way past that. It has nothing to do with the fact that he is a step parent.
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
SparklingWine Offline
Normality, my friends.
Jeez, get a life!
***********
 
SparklingWine's Avatar
 
Name: Lynds :)
Age: 27
Gender: Grill ;)
Location: Seattle

Posts: 7,232
Blog Entries: 197
Join Date: February 19th 2009

Re: what to do - April 6th 2011, 07:37 PM

Brittany,

I have a few things that could possibly help you out. I think something that you could do is counseling. You've been through tramatic experiences with your dad, so being around men triggers old memories and thoughts. A counselor can help you to feel more comfortable and help you deal with the past. Also, by talking to a counselor, they can help give you tips and advice on how to trust your step dad more.

The second thing is, take things slow with your step dad. What would make you trust him? If you know, you can talk to him about it. You aren't expected to warm up to him right away. Maybe you can play a board game with him one night, or go out on a short outing to get ice cream or something. If you take it one step at a time, that should really help. You just have to have an open mind about it. It might also help to get to know him more before letting him get to know you. This way you can see that he is an okay guy<3


  Send a message via AIM to SparklingWine Send a message via MSN to SparklingWine  
  (#7 (permalink)) Old
1yr1a Offline
Member
Not a n00b
**
 
1yr1a's Avatar
 
Age: 23
Gender: Male
Location: devon

Posts: 50
Join Date: February 10th 2011

Re: what to do - April 8th 2011, 09:01 PM

my mum has devrsed 2 times and i have had to be friends with them and just start off small like say hi when you see him around or tell him small problems or fake ones see how he helps you thats all i can really think off sorry if my advice is bad but im just trying to help ok hope this does


I love sleep. My life has this tendency to fall apart when I'm awake.

If you want my help message me i will help everyone and everyone no one should be unheard.
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.