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Help me!!!! - May 6th 2011, 12:38 AM

Okay so my best friend parents are literally crazy. She is 18 and is severly grounded because she wouldnt try out for volleyball at the local college she isnt even going to in the fall... Her parents grounded her from her phone, internet, car, softball games, mp3, and the most severe two is food and drinks (like water and juice and stuff no alcohol) i dont know what to do. also her parents are kicking her out on the day of graduation. She is moving in with me then. She doesnt want to leave early because of her brother and sisters can someone please tell me what i can do to help her. She is seriously my best friend and i dont know what to do... This is not right no one should treat their daugghter this way can u plz help me
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Re: Help me!!!! - May 6th 2011, 12:45 AM

Her parents honestly sound REALLY strict. You sound like a great supportive friend. I can understand her wanting to be there for her siblings, but she needs to be there for herself. If she is in an emotionally unstable enviornment, then she needs to do whatever it takes to get herself out of it. For whatever reason, her parents feel the need to be strict. But you have to think of it this way- While you and your friend might not think that it's fair, her parents do. And her parents still have a say in things. It's unfortunate, but it's the truth. You just have to see it from where they are coming from.

I think that your friend could potentially benefit from talking to her parents. And what I mean by that is, communicate to them that she feels the actions they take on her are unjust. Obviously I wouldn't do it in such a way that they feel attacked. Your friend just needs to be honest and upfront with them about her concerns. Again, you sound like a great friend, and she is soooo lucky to have you! :]

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Re: Help me!!!! - May 6th 2011, 12:51 AM

Seriosly no offense but they havent fed her in three days she seriously hasnt ate anything she cant even eat at school because it is all ran through computers and her she will get in trouble for eating im sorry byr a parent should not be able to do that and i dont think this will benifit it her at all... she is 18 it is her choice where to go to college and if she doesnt want to play sports she shouldnt have to
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Re: Help me!!!! - May 6th 2011, 01:33 AM

I hate to sound so cold... but if your friend is not being treated well by her parents, then she should move out. She's 18, so technically, her parents are no longer obligated to provide ANYTHING for her, INCLUDING food, water, and shelter. If they wanted to kick her out NOW, they could. I'm not saying that's right - in fact, it's quite disgusting of them - but according to the law, they are no longer legally responsible for meeting her needs.

So if you want to help out your friend, I suggest you try three things:

1) Let her come stay with you now.
If she's not willing to leave yet, at least bring food/water with you to school every day so she can eat/drink something.

2) Help her look for jobs online and around your home.
Contact non-profit organizations like Good Will.
Look up the requirements for government welfare programs like the food stamp plan.

* 3) Encourage your friend to continue talking to her parents - perhaps they'll let up.

* In all honesty, though, what her parents are doing is extremely neglectful. If I were in her position, I would probably just grab whatever I could, load it up into a friend's car, leave, and never go back. She may not be able to sue her parents for neglect at this point in her life, but given the nature of her relationship with them, I wouldn't want anything to do with them.

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