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Kell_Bell13 Offline
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Exclamation Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 11th 2011, 12:48 AM

My mom told me I was annoying her and she was going to eat dinner with my brother (whos 4). I just rolled my eyes and got my IPod out. She brought my uncles dog over here earlier because SHE WANTED TO. Then she said I couldnt go eat with her because I didnt "Dog proof" the living room... for the dog SHE brought in! Then before she left, she took my IPod and my Cell phone. She pays for my cell phone, so I dont really care about that. But I bought my Ipod with my OWN money that I earned working this summer. I'm only 14, so I still have to legally follow her rules blah blah blah... but since I paid for my Ipod is it considered stealing since she took it and its mine? I left the reciept at my Aunts house... but I can get proof it's mine if I need to. Since I'm underage, can she take my IPod without my permission?? I'm really sick of my moms crap... (Here comes the Language) she calls me a BITCH, a WHORE (because I broke up with my controlling BF that was a total jerk to my uncle, who I look up to.), and a SHITTY PERSON. I live in Missouri, United States...

Last edited by Kell_Bell13; July 11th 2011 at 12:50 AM. Reason: Didnt mean to hit "Post"
   
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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 11th 2011, 01:08 AM

I don't know about stealing. Just because if your mum said she bought it, they'd probably take her word over yours ...
But it does sound like she treats you pretty bad, I think you should talk to someone about that. Like the names she calls you etc. Even just a teacher at school, someone you trust. Noone deserves to be treated like that, epecially after you stood up to a controlling bf.


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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 11th 2011, 01:23 AM

I have proof that I bought it. My aunt said she'd vouch for me and so would my cousin and my dad. Also though is it abuse to eat dinner out and leave me and my sister at home with only unhealthy snacks? the only "healthy" food we have is hot pockets and my dad went off on my little sister when she ate one.
   
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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 11th 2011, 01:53 AM

I don't know a lot about laws but look at it this way. What are you going to do if it is illegal have her arrested? Are you going to go live with a relative or friend if she goes to jail? It might not be okay, but think how much she has spent on you already, food, water, gas, electricity, roof over your head, drives you places, etc. For the material things, she can take them away if she wants she is your mom, she is the boss. As long as you live under her roof, she is in control and can tell you what to do and when to do it look at the bigger picture.


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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 11th 2011, 07:35 AM

I'm not a lawyer/attorney, so I can't answer with absolute certainty... but I'm pretty sure that a minor child in the US can have their property taken away by their parents, regardless of how it was obtained (ex. purchased or given as a gift). Minors, unfortunately, do not have the same rights that adults do. You could try looking up minor law or property law in Missouri, but honestly, I don't think you'd have a case against your mother. Even if you bought the iPod, your mother has the right to enforce punishments/revoke privileges, so long as they are reasonable. Preventing you from using a "luxury" item because you failed to follow the rules she established is not considered "stealing". Your best bet is to follow her rules, no matter how unreasonable, in order to stay on her "good side" and avoid further consequences. When you're 18, you can do whatever you want. =P





   
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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 11th 2011, 07:53 AM

I was more thinking that the name calling is not OK. And leaving you alone at 14 is probably not legal. Much as you're probably fine looking after yourself ...
I'm not saying go and rat her out to the police, but maybe talk to your dad or aunt or someone else you trust and see if they can help you talk to her about the problems you're having.


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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 11th 2011, 09:33 AM

I'm not sure about in the US, but i think it's legal in the ~UK for a fourteen year old to be left at home alone for a few hours. With regards to the name calling, you might want to speak to someone about that, because (depending on how often it occurs/the context in which it takes place) name calling is considered emotional abuse.


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July 11th 2011, 04:03 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pelios View Post
I don't know a lot about laws but look at it this way. What are you going to do if it is illegal have her arrested? Are you going to go live with a relative or friend if she goes to jail? It might not be okay, but think how much she has spent on you already, food, water, gas, electricity, roof over your head, drives you places, etc. For the material things, she can take them away if she wants she is your mom, she is the boss. As long as you live under her roof, she is in control and can tell you what to do and when to do it look at the bigger picture.
Well, I disagree with this post.

I agree that it would be silly to get her mother arrested when a simple chat would fix this. But don't start about the money. A child doesn't choose to be born. It is the parent's choice. They knew a kid is a shitload of cash.

Here's where I disagree. She is not the boss, she cannot control the OP. That is a common misconception. For instance the OP has rights to their safety, the right to feel happy, the right to their own body in every way. They have a lot of rights, I'm just mentioning that posting that isn't a good message to put on these boards.

- Justin

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fictional View Post
I'm not sure about in the US, but i think it's legal in the ~UK for a fourteen year old to be left at home alone for a few hours. With regards to the name calling, you might want to speak to someone about that, because (depending on how often it occurs/the context in which it takes place) name calling is considered emotional abuse.
In Canda the age is either ten, for limited amounts of time, and twelve for as long as you want.

In the United States I think it is the same.

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Last edited by PSY; July 12th 2011 at 06:10 PM. Reason: Merged consecutive posts.
   
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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 11th 2011, 06:10 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JKmadu619 View Post
Well, I disagree with this post.

I agree that it would be silly to get her mother arrested when a simple chat would fix this. But don't start about the money. A child doesn't choose to be born. It is the parent's choice. They knew a kid is a shitload of cash.
Here's where I disagree. She is not the boss, she cannot control the OP. That is a common misconception. For instance the OP has rights to their safety, the right to feel happy, the right to their own body in every way. They have a lot of rights, I'm just mentioning that posting that isn't a good message to put on these boards.

- Justin
AH I had written a whole post and my internet messed it up. =/
I'll summarize, you don’t pick to be born into this life but you still are and while you underage you have to follow the rules of your parents just like in a country where you have to obey the laws of the government. She does have rights but she has an obligation to obey her parents because they are the authority of the house. Just like in the country example.


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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 12th 2011, 09:01 AM

I don't see the issue with you having to dog-proof the living room. She may have gotten the dog but she's probably busy with making dinner and likely working.

I haven't looked up the laws for your particular state but the USA signed the Convention on the Rights of the Child (CRC) as proposed by the United Nations. While this international law does state that the voices of the child would be heard in matters pertaining to the child, it also states that parents should raise their child in appropriate ways. However, it does not define what these ways are.

With regards to stealing, you don't have strong arguments in your favour. Since you bought it, yes the iPod is yours. However, the CRC and similar legislation regarding parenting state that parents have to value the well-being of the child and their development. In this view, your mother may feel you use the iPod too much, so she acts like a teacher and confiscates it but not necessarily use it. This is further supported because your mother at some point gives you an opportunity to use the iPod. Besides, even if you are to sue her (or rather father or aunt sues her on your behalf), your best bet is a civil trial where you sue for money but this brings the huge problem of figuring out what amount of money you sue for and can easily be thrown out. Criminally, there's next to no support for you either.

In regards to "unhealthy" snacks, there's a huge issue of why doesn't your father intervene? I presume he lives with you guys. The best you could probably go for is negligence but when it comes to "unhealthy" snacks, it's a very open-ended statement and if your mother does provide you with healthier foods during the day, I don't see any case.

The only case I can see is a possible issue of how long she leaves you two alone for. You'll have to look up the state laws for this. The verbal treatment you receive may also be grounds for questioning your mother's parenting skills and possibly a case, however, in all honesty, this would probably go through Child Services and at most they would take you two away from her and pursue a case by the state of Missouri. If they take you two away, there would be some psychological examining particularly for abuse. Depending on your father's and aunt's living conditions, you two would stay with one of them (assuming your father doesn't live with you guys).


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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 12th 2011, 11:02 AM

Your mother allows you to have the things, and she gave you life. Taking away things a child lives as punishment is usually called 'grounding'.

As for dog-proofing the living room, I've had to baby-proof my entire house on more than a few occasions. You kinda just have to do what they say, they're the parents.

Verbal abuse is really hard to prove, I've never seen anything really happen when someone reports it. (NOT by any means saying it's okay! But, that's just how it is)


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Re: Is this considered stealing, since I'm underage (PLEASE READ) - July 15th 2011, 04:23 PM

In the US I'm pretty sure parents can take away your possessions even if you bought them because you are a minor in their house. For instance, if you got a piercing that you paid for your parents can still make you take it out and do what they please with the jewelry. It's just how it is.

You do have a case for negligence and abuse though (verbal abuse).
   
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