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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Someday Offline
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Angry My Mum's Alcohol Problem - July 13th 2011, 06:24 PM

So, my Mum is heavily addicted to alcohol, whether she likes it or not. Even if I ask her to not drink for a mere hour, she can't help herself. It's what gets her through the day.

And this I wouldn't find quite such a problem, but when she gets drunk not only does she become a horrible person but she seems to have no true comprehension of what's going on around her... and that's all day, every day atm.

And even then it wouldn't be such an issue, but I woke up this morning to the fire alarm and the smell of gas all over the flat because she had left the gas hob on all night. I asked her why it was on, she just mumbled spaghetti then proceeded to shout at me like usual. That ascended into the usual argument and before long, a neighbour called the police. The police did * all to help the situation(that's the 4th time police have visited, the 3rd time they havn't even bothered finding a solution to the problem at hand).

So, not only now is she a * when she drinks(all the time) but she's dangerous too. Heck, I recall her coming at me with a knife 4 years ago. Why I didn't bring it up to someone at the time I don't know, because 4 years on there's no-one I can turn to for help.

And it's making me angry. I'm emotionally numb, and I have been for a while because of the place my life is in right now. But now I feel such anger I feel like I could... I don't even know what I should finish that sentence on. I'm scared by what I could finish that sentence on.

My life just * sucks. But I won't go on further down that road, as I've already been there before and I don't think there's much I can do for a few years, and there's no further advice I can be given on that front.

Anyway, what should I do? She's going to drink regardless of what I say or do, even if she manages to stay sober and I bring the problem up she just brushes it aside, every single time. She even got a letter from an old persons home before, telling her not to come back in the state she was in. She just said it was rubbish. I tried explaining to her that finally someone else had seen what I see almost every day, but she doesn't care. Or she just cares more about her alcohol than about me. Idk what to do. Help please...


“Somewhere there is someone that dreams of your smile, and finds in your presence that life is worthwhile, so when you are lonely remember it’s true, someone somewhere is thinking of you.”

   
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Re: My Mum's Alcohol Problem - July 13th 2011, 09:34 PM

I'm not sure how social services works in London, but I imagine you could call the police/child services and explain that your caretaker (aka your mother) is addicted to alcohol, to the point where she is neglectful in her duties as a caretaker. Definitely mention the recent incident where she left the gas on. Your mother may not be abusing you now, but she certainly has reached a point where she's not looking out for your best interests... and you may be able to do something about your situation if you can prove that to the proper authorities. She could be forced to attend AA meetings, or you could be removed from her home until she gets her act together, or there may be other options that the police/child services can offer.





   
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Re: My Mum's Alcohol Problem - July 13th 2011, 10:28 PM

Robin is definitely right. Find some way to get her help and a safer environment for you.



I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons.
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we can still choose where we go from there.
We can still do things. And we can try to feel okay about them.

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Re: My Mum's Alcohol Problem - July 14th 2011, 12:21 PM

Im sorry your going through this.
I experienced that before.. but she wasn't violent.
I agree with all the rest.. call 999 ect.. But what really helped my mum was alcoholic anonymous.
It took a while, my mum hasn't changed completely but she isn't drinking as much..
Sorry im not very good at advice.. But Pm/WP me if you want to or need help.xx


It serves a lot of functions in my life. I use it as a way to punish myself, I use it as a way to medicate myself, I use it for the tension release when things get too strong or too built up. –ditto

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