TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives


You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Gidig Offline
Optimistic pessimist
I can't get enough
*********
 
Gidig's Avatar
 
Name: Maria
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: Colorado

Posts: 2,123
Blog Entries: 390
Join Date: January 5th 2009

Friends and fights... Suicidal. - July 19th 2011, 07:41 AM

I had a friend living with me for a few months, rent-free. We got jobs together, were planning on living together, just as friends.

Then she stopped hanging out with me and basically moved out, leaving most of her stuff behind and I only saw her at work. I confronted her and said I thought she was doing too many drugs and alcohol. I said it in a way that Ala-non would approve of. And thought it went, kind of well.

Then she's been ditching me hardcore. She'll say she's going to hang out, and then just doesn't. I asked her to talk to me sometime before I left for Ohio and I'm leaving tomorrow. And she just... couldn't seem to find the time... I told her I was pissed at her and wanted to talk it out. And she just got bitchy with me. I ended up crying and leaving work...

And then tonight. I finally told her fuck you. That she's been taking advantage of me, and honestly she did use me. Then she just left me... during some of the worst points in my life she didn't even fucking talk to me. She can't find five FUCKING minutes to talk to me about it.

Then my other friend texts me, telling me that I'm a bitch and it was so mean of me to do that to this person. Blah blah blah. He told me it was wrong to confront her about her alcohol problem and that I was immature in doing so. Then said he still loved me and hoped things turned out okay. O.o

I've been crying since it happened, and I can't stop. I'm literally suicidal over this. And honestly probably would have done it if I wasn't going to Ohio tomorrow. I self harmed really fucking bad... It doesn't need stitches but I really need to be careful.

What do I do? I'm planning and going and seeing this person at work tomorrow and just fucking... I don't know. Make her talk to me. I don't want to lose her as a friend, I don't want to enable an alcoholic either. I just.. .want to die this is hurting me so bad.



The best wayout is always through~
-Robert Frost

Proud member of the LGBT community.

   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Stupidity Kills
Outside, huh?
**********
 
OMFG!You'reActuallySmart!'s Avatar
 

Posts: 4,500
Blog Entries: 10
Join Date: December 19th 2009

Re: Friends and fights... Suicidal. - July 19th 2011, 08:26 AM

First off, ignore what the friend you texted you said. If I were you, I would tell them to drop their pants, take the phone, turn it sideways and shove it up their arse. It's clear your friend living with you talks to the texting friend because she ran to him for help and to be consoled. Assuming he has his mind right, she may have told him a different version of events and he reacted accordingly.

I'm not understanding why you were crying and self-harming but you mentioned she used you in the past and weren't there for you, even for a few minutes. In that respect, I think it's questionable whether she considers you a friend or just a person with a room for her rent-free.

When you talk to her tell her what you said here: you fear losing her friendship and fear you may be invoking her alcoholism. Normally I would say don't confront her at work as you may face some reprocussions from your fellow employees and manager/boss but since you're leaving tomorrow, it only matters if you plan to return to that job. If you don't plan to return to it, then confront her at work and you don't have much time to sit and doddle, so let it all out on her. If she becomes bitchy toward you, then brush it aside and say what you need to say to her. Hopefully she can understand it, if not, then that's her problem not yours.

Once you've let it out to her, then acknowledge that for better or for worse that time of your life is finished as you're going to Ohio.

I'm not sure what to say to you to discourage further self-harm and suicidal ideas because you probably would react emotionally. All I can tell you is before you make a move on yourself, look at the recent cut you made on yourself and try to accept that's all the self-punishment you need to deliver to yourself.


I can rip you off, and steal all your cash, suckerpunch you in the face, stand back and laugh. Leave you stranded as fast as a heart-attack.
- Danko Jones (I Think Bad Thoughts)
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Gidig Offline
Optimistic pessimist
I can't get enough
*********
 
Gidig's Avatar
 
Name: Maria
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Location: Colorado

Posts: 2,123
Blog Entries: 390
Join Date: January 5th 2009

Re: Friends and fights... Suicidal. - July 19th 2011, 08:49 AM

Thanks for the reply.

I'm just really sad about it all because I thought we were so close... we were so close actually. I don't really have good friends, and I let her in to my life. I thought I finally found someone I could trust, but apparently not. Heh.

She's a delivery driver, so I can catch her when she's on a run without causing a disturbance inside. She's really passive so I don't think she'll react badly, but I'm afraid she's just going to lie to me. I'm sick lies really, they clearly got us both nowhere.

I think I just need to learn to turn off emotions hah!



The best wayout is always through~
-Robert Frost

Proud member of the LGBT community.

   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
PSY Offline
Hugh Jackman ♥

TeenHelp Veteran
*************
 
PSY's Avatar
 
Name: Robin
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Location: Southern California

Posts: 10,034
Blog Entries: 35
Join Date: June 12th 2009

Re: Friends and fights... Suicidal. - July 19th 2011, 08:17 PM

Drugs and alcohol can do strange things to a person. Your friend-radar was probably accurate at the time... but then she changed for the worst. You aren't to blame for what she chose to do - so stop punishing yourself for something that wasn't your fault! I agree with what was said above: confront her, if you need to get things off your chest. If you're leaving for Ohio (permanently), you may also want to tell her to get all her crap out of your apartment/house. Otherwise, it's all going to charity. Which, to be honest, would be a pretty kick-arse form of revenge... she wasn't there for you, but her possessions can go to good use! =P





   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
fights, friends, suicidal

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.