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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Worth giving up on a friend over? - December 2nd 2011, 06:55 PM

We were only ever at all close three years ago, and in the last one to two years he's just been such an attention seeking twat. We get on online most of the time, but in person I always just find him boring anyway. He also doesn't seem like he's very close to me either; we have friends in common that he'll go to about something instead of to me. We were debating on facebook earlier and the views he were presenting are just so right-wing and racist, it's making me think I just want to give up on him completely. It's not the first time he's been very offensive, and he doesn't apologise for it. I guess I'm just asking if you guys think that on top of not really getting on with him too well when we meet in person, are such differing political views a viable reason to end a friendship?

There's always light at the end of a tunnel, even if you have to pass a few bends to see it.

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Mada tooi anataboshi
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Re: Worth giving up on a friend over? - December 2nd 2011, 07:27 PM

Differing political views are not worth ending a friendship, unless you feel the friend's behaviour is out of order or particularly offensive. Which from what youve told me, it sounds like it is. Now don't get me wrong; I don't have a lot of respect for the right wing. I find I get along better with people who have similiar views, but at the same time we all have to respect that other people have different opinions.

However. There are some opinions that really shouldn't be expressed, particularly if he values your friendship. You told me outside this thread that what he said was particularly offensive, and if that's how he's going to treat the friendship, maybe the best thing you can do is avoid him. Just ask yourself is it worth it? The friendships I've ended are the ones in which I haven't had a lot to lose, I wasn't close to that person, and I couldn't spend five minutes in a room with them without wanting to hit them because they were just so offensive.

It's up to you but I think if I was in your situation I'd stay away. I would say that if you're going to end the friendship it should be because his behaviour was unacceptable, not simply because he is right wing. But from what I know about this, his behaviour was completely uncalled for.

Take care honey x

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