TeenHelp
Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!


Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Member
I can't get enough
*********
 
better-than-ecstasy's Avatar
 
Name: Rachell
Age: 22
Gender: Female
Location: With God on the corner of First and Amistad

Posts: 2,688
Join Date: July 22nd 2011

I Don't Understand - February 20th 2012, 02:56 AM

Why do friends and family members judge you for the mistakes you've made when they have made the same mistakes? Or like your parents believe one child, but not the other? I thought most mothers could tell if their child was lying? I just don't understand why we do these things to the ones we love. Any ideas?


~I was always scared of everything, even the carousel.~

~Don't worry about me. I'm sort of feeling fine, but by tomorrow, I'll be back on my feet again.~

-Goodnight Tonight
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
Member
Outside, huh?
**********
 
Chris's Avatar
 
Name: Chris
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Location: Illinios

Posts: 4,247
Blog Entries: 3
Join Date: November 28th 2011

Re: I Don't Understand - February 20th 2012, 05:07 AM

“When you're screwing up and nobody says anything to you anymore, that means they've given up on you.”
― Randy Pausch

Judging, is a huge part of life - and we do it aswell even when we don't think about it. I doubt your Friend and family did it to make you feel bad. This society we live in is very hypocritical, and they mention the things that you do wrong (even though they have made the same mistakes) to make your learn and to better you. I wouldn't take to much offense to it.

Alot of mothers can tell if we are lying, but mothers, like teachers, always have a favorite. That does NOT mean that a mother does not love all her children equally, but it just means that they get along with, or have a better connection with one child over another. A mothers love is superior to any other kind of love.


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Member
I can't get enough
*********
 
better-than-ecstasy's Avatar
 
Name: Rachell
Age: 22
Gender: Female
Location: With God on the corner of First and Amistad

Posts: 2,688
Join Date: July 22nd 2011

Re: I Don't Understand - February 20th 2012, 03:45 PM

I like the quote. Thanks, it helps. I just don't think friends and family should treat me like that every day. They should realize it hurt sometimes, in my opinion. That is a great way to look at others, my science teacher told me that persoanlly as a teacher, but I never thought the same situation could go for a mother.


~I was always scared of everything, even the carousel.~

~Don't worry about me. I'm sort of feeling fine, but by tomorrow, I'll be back on my feet again.~

-Goodnight Tonight
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Stupidity Kills
Outside, huh?
**********
 
OMFG!You'reActuallySmart!'s Avatar
 

Posts: 4,500
Blog Entries: 10
Join Date: December 19th 2009

Re: I Don't Understand - February 20th 2012, 05:09 PM

When family members judge, they draw from their personal experiences both as an adult and when they were your age. If they weren't significantly hurt by it then they probably figure you're not significantly hurt either but it's your responsibility to speak up and tell them it hurts. Your family and friends want the best for you, sometimes that means you got to take a bit of hurt. I was taught by my parents that when they judge me and however much it may hurt, it's to help me grow as a person. When it is done all the time it can be difficult depending how you view it.

Mothers are like any untrained human being, detecting lies or deception is roughly 30-40% accurate. I suppose it may be a bit higher given they have more knowledge of the child compared to a stranger, however, mothers will not always call out on the lie even when they correctly detect it as they may acknowledge any distress the child is facing and are more concerned of helping the child handle the stress rather than punish for lying. When it comes to a family with 2 or more children, the mother often favours one over the other and adopt a more positive bias. On the other hand, one child may be poor at concealing the lie.


I can rip you off, and steal all your cash, suckerpunch you in the face, stand back and laugh. Leave you stranded as fast as a heart-attack.
- Danko Jones (I Think Bad Thoughts)
   
  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Member
I can't get enough
*********
 
better-than-ecstasy's Avatar
 
Name: Rachell
Age: 22
Gender: Female
Location: With God on the corner of First and Amistad

Posts: 2,688
Join Date: July 22nd 2011

Re: I Don't Understand - February 21st 2012, 03:24 AM

Thank you so much, yeah I should stand up for myself more.


~I was always scared of everything, even the carousel.~

~Don't worry about me. I'm sort of feeling fine, but by tomorrow, I'll be back on my feet again.~

-Goodnight Tonight
   
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
understand

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




All material copyright 1998-2019, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.