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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Solivagant Offline
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Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 21st 2012, 07:26 PM

Okay so on my birthday, 4 of my girl friends are coming home to spend the day with me. And we are all pretty close. As close as I can be to a person, since I never open up about my feelings to anyone I love them all and they are really special to me. One of them even knows about my SH. So now, there is this doctor's prescription on my pin board. It clearly says a psychiatrist. They will definitely notice it.

Now if I remove it, I might feel later on that I shouldn't have hidden, I should have let them know. There won't be any other chance to bring up this topic.

But if I do let them know, it means getting confronted about bad stuff on my lovely birthday. And I want this birthday to go perfect. I don't know when I'll get to celebrate it again. This is the first time in years. I Want at least one good birthday that I can remember happily.

So, I don't know, whether I should put it somewhere they won't see it or just let it be.



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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 21st 2012, 07:31 PM

I think that you really really should tell them. But just so you can have a nice time on your birthday, you should wait until the end of the party to bring it up it's really great that your going to tell your friends about this! Good luck!


Exert your talents, and distinguish yourself, and don't think of retiring from the world, until the world will be sorry that you retire


   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 21st 2012, 07:31 PM

No reason why you cant tell them and still have a good day, you'll probably feel after, that a huge weight has lifted and this will make the day more enjoyable
   
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 21st 2012, 10:07 PM

I think you should tell them. Not everything is going to be perfect. But if you're looking for perfection or something like it, wait until things are calmed down where everybody might be a little tired and out of energy. That way they won't go all crazy on you.


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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 22nd 2012, 02:33 AM

Letting them find out doesn't have to ruin your birthday. Put a positive spin on it! If they notice the piece of paper and say something about it, I would tell them, "Yeah, we're celebrating two things today: my birthday, and the beginning of my journey toward recovery!" If they have more questions, tell them you'd be happy to discuss it tomorrow, after your birthday is over.






   
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 22nd 2012, 02:41 AM

I agree I think you should tell them for sure, especially if you feel like you want to. I don't think that telling them about it would ruin your birthday at all, but if you're worried that it could make things a bit awkward just wait until the party is almost over to discuss it with them. If someone notices it on your board before then, like it was mentioned, just tell them that it's just another thing you can all celebrate! Getting help should never turn into a negative thing...you should be proud of yourself for it!



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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 22nd 2012, 04:49 AM

I agree with the above comments. I would just keep it up there. They may even keep it to themselves and not even talk about it - or they may not even see it. But if they do, I would go with what PSY said, and put a positive spin on things.

I'm sure everything will go fine, and you will have fun. The real good news is that you may even feel way happier that your friends know about the past SH. It might lift a weight off your shoulders. Who knows?




Best wishes,
Chris


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  (#8 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 22nd 2012, 12:28 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PSY View Post
Letting them find out doesn't have to ruin your birthday. Put a positive spin on it! If they notice the piece of paper and say something about it, I would tell them, "Yeah, we're celebrating two things today: my birthday, and the beginning of my journey toward recovery!" If they have more questions, tell them you'd be happy to discuss it tomorrow, after your birthday is over.
Well, that sounds awesome

Quote:
Originally Posted by ForgetMeNot9 View Post
I agree I think you should tell them for sure, especially if you feel like you want to. I don't think that telling them about it would ruin your birthday at all, but if you're worried that it could make things a bit awkward just wait until the party is almost over to discuss it with them. If someone notices it on your board before then, like it was mentioned, just tell them that it's just another thing you can all celebrate! Getting help should never turn into a negative thing...you should be proud of yourself for it!
Quote:
Originally Posted by chrisjackson911 View Post

I'm sure everything will go fine, and you will have fun. The real good news is that you may even feel way happier that your friends know about the past SH. It might lift a weight off your shoulders. Who knows?




Okay so here's what, firstly, SH is not in the past. Yet And if I do tell them they will ask questions like Why am I seeing a psychiatrist, and I don't have any answer to that. I am still trying to figure out what is wrong with me. I seriously have no idea why I am like this now when all the bad things are over. And they won't understand SH. The one friend that knows keeps telling me to stop this "craziness/stupidity". I don't like it when people call it that and I can't explain why I can't stop or why I am doing it. I want them to understand but I don't know how to make them understand. I know they will understand if only I knew hot to make them understand.

And one more thing, the page on my pin board, do I let the side on which "Psychiatrist and all that is written" or the blank side. If it is the blank side upwards then they might not even notice, they most probably won't. And I know I will never bring this up with them, this is the only way they'll get to know about all this. So I have to decide, tell them or no. I am a bit positive after the "celebration" comment. Honestly, I look at my birthday as a celebration of being alive till now. So it makes a lot of sense to me. But I don't have the answers to their questions yet. I don't know what the heck went wrong with me.



"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic, capable of both inflicting injury and remedying it."

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  (#9 (permalink)) Old
Chris Offline
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 22nd 2012, 09:55 PM

If they ask questions that you simply don't have the answer too, then you need to say 'I'm still trying to figure it out myself.' Chances are they still will want to ask questions, and it seems to me that you want them to know, and to understand what is going on, but you simply just don't know where to start, and how to explain it to them. I would sit down and think about possible questions they may ask, and just be truthful with them and yourself.

It will be tough to explain certain things, and to talk about some things - but think about the outcome, and them being able to atleast see and somewhat understand whats going on (because no one will fully understand unless they have walked a mile in your shoes and have gone through what you have gone through).


Chris
I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...

Last edited by Chris; February 24th 2012 at 08:18 PM.
   
  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 24th 2012, 04:37 PM

Hey, just wondering how it went?
   
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
Solivagant Offline
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 25th 2012, 10:56 AM

Thanks for asking! They didn't see it and didn't ask



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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 25th 2012, 12:44 PM

Ahh fair enough, at least you dont have to worry about it
   
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Re: Should I tell them? Please reply before Thursday!! - February 25th 2012, 06:40 PM

Since the issue has been resolved, I'm going to go ahead and close this thread. Feel free to PM me or Chris if you would like to have this thread re-opened, or feel free to create a new thread! =)






   
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