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Death and Grieving Coping with a loss is difficult at any age. If you need support, ask in this forum.

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.Brittany. Offline
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Friend's Funerals - June 29th 2012, 01:35 AM

As some of you know, I was in a bad car accident Sunday night, 2 of my friends passed away in the crash, I met with the families today of my 2 friends, and they asked me to sing at the funeral, as they feel its what my friends would want, I don't know what to say..

What's your thoughts on this..


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Re: Friend's Funerals - June 29th 2012, 01:42 AM

I don't think you should, which you know my answer. Just because you need to grieve and not sure it would help with the grieving, ya know? It's 100% your decision but just remember you need time to grieve. If you think it will help you to cope to sing, then I support your decision on that.
   
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Re: Friend's Funerals - June 29th 2012, 05:07 AM

I think you knew your friends well enough to know that they would understand why you wouldn't sing if you didn't want to. I think a prepared emotional speech would suffice, as well as including your feelings towards having the desire to sing at the funeral in dedication of the friends, but the loss of your friends have left you with such a weakness that you can barely speak. That way, you honor the family with an emotional speech, acknowledging their request, having a desire to fulfill that quest, but having a good reason not to.



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Re: Friend's Funerals - June 29th 2012, 05:41 PM

First off, I'm sorry for your loss.

I feel that this is a decision you really need to think about. I don't see how singing would be a bad thing (other than emotions getting involved), and I also don't see how not singing would be a bad thing either. I think you need to think about whats best for you; and whatever decision you pick, I'm sure your friends (even though they passed), and your friends families will understand.

Take your time, and weight the pros/cons of each option.


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Re: Friend's Funerals - June 30th 2012, 01:39 AM

I totally agree with Chris, This is really a decision you need to make on your own. Only you knows what's best for you we can give you advice but you need to choose which way to go with it.I hope you choose the choice that's best for you. Remember we all care about you and want what's best.


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Re: Friend's Funerals - June 30th 2012, 02:38 AM

And I totally agree with Chris and Ivan.

That said...

My heart goes out to you Brittany.

How very sad.

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Re: Friend's Funerals - July 1st 2012, 02:32 PM

I'm so sorry this has happened Brittany, I hope you are holding up.

I think this is totally your decision. I think you need to grieve and that it is very important to make time for that. But, could you use singing to be your goodbye to them? Almost as a tribute to them and that might honestly be a really good thing for you to do as it may really help with the grieving process. If not, as mentioned, you could read a poem, talk, do something. Either way it is totally understandable whatever you choose and I'm sure the families will be accepting of that.

Hope this helps you come to the decision right for you, PM me if you ever want a chat.
Take care,
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Re: Friend's Funerals - July 3rd 2012, 08:04 AM

I kind of agree with the two guys on this one, its something you need to decide on your own, and briana is right too, you also need to greive. I'm so sorry for you loss <3


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