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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
idamareex Offline
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Name: Ida
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My mother is dead ,how can i survive? - December 1st 2013, 01:50 AM

I miss her alot.im not sure if im able to survive. I don't want to die but im so sad nowadays.im never able to talk to her,see her face or call her. I don't know what to do! She's gone and it hurts so much. If my mother drank alcohol before she killed herself,is it then an accident? I would like to think so,she didn't want to die,she tried her hardest to survive. Maybe shes at peace now.she went through alot of shit in her life and she told me on her last days how tired she was .i know how she feels,been there done that. Some support would be nice now.
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Re: My mother is dead ,how can i survive? - December 1st 2013, 02:04 AM

Ida, Its never easy losing a parent.
I am so sorry.
She is at peace, and she is okay now.
You need to pull through, remember she wouldn't want you to be sad, she wouldn't want you to give up on life. She would want you to live it, to its fullest, and remember that it will be okay. She would want you to be happy.

Don't give up now. Do it for your Mom, do it for you!
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Re: My mother is dead ,how can i survive? - December 1st 2013, 02:21 AM

Even though you can't talk face to face to your mother anymore, you can still sort of "talk" to her every night, saying anything you'd want her to know. Or, you can even write a letter where you get out your last words to her. What you do after you write it is up to you. You can carefully burn it, keep it, send it to the wind, or tie it to a balloon, for example. It can at least help to get out what you need to say.

Remember the good times and let them make you laugh as well, because you don't have to be brought down by every thought of her. Kayla is right that she'd want you to live life to the fullest.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

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Re: My mother is dead ,how can i survive? - December 1st 2013, 05:44 AM

Thanks for the support! I really needed it. I don't think im going to kill myself though. It just gets hard at times. At least i won't be alone in heaven when the time comes.
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Re: My mother is dead ,how can i survive? - December 1st 2013, 04:10 PM

You are allowed at least 48 hours to cry your little heart out..after that reality kicks in. You can't bring her back right? Did the earth stop revolving? No,so that means hours go by days past and Life Goes On. It's up to you to start thinking about what you think your mom would want you to do. She would want you to be happy. You need to be a better person than before and show your strength,make her proud up there in the heavens baby.
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Re: My mother is dead ,how can i survive? - December 2nd 2013, 12:22 AM

Hi Ida,

I'm really sorry to hear about your recent family related passing. Losing someone is never easy, especially when it's a parent or someone you're really close too. Being sad, being upset, and sometimes even being angry and/or confused is a normal part of the grieving process. If after a month or so, you feel things aren't improving and your mother passing is taking a huge toll on you, I'd try to seek some sort of professional help. You can talk to a trusted adult, a counselor/social worker, or even a teacher. These people can help you through the rough times you're currently dealing with.

As I said, the rush of emotions you're feeling is normal and healthy; unless they're consuming your every day activities. If so, seek help.

I hope things begin to improve soon! You can always feel free to PM me if you'd like to talk.

Best wishes,

I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
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Re: My mother is dead ,how can i survive? - December 4th 2013, 05:11 AM

I'm sorry for your loss. I've never known my dad, but I cannot imagine losing my mother. I am nostalgic which I see a little bit in you. I would write to my mom. I would write to her a good-bye letter. Even if it took months to write. I'd let her know I loved her and miss her very much. I'd let myself cry. When I was done writing and reliving my experiences with my mom through the letter and done expressing my feelings to her, I'd throw the letter in a river or the ocean or burn it and move on. Maybe I'm weird, but it's what I'd try to do. If your feelings get too negative and you have any thoughts of suicide, consider a therapist.

"For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love."
- Carl Sagan
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