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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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Funerals bring my family together - August 5th 2009, 05:40 AM

Recently these last few years there has been a lot of deaths in my family some by natural causes and some not.One thing i have notice though is after every funeral the entire family goes out to eat afterwards and all of us will just sit there and talk and laugh and catch up.Most of them we havent seen since the last time there was a funeral .Usually we end up being at the restraunt for over 5 hours.I guess it weird but its how we deal with our loss and its the one thing that reminds us to spend time together cause you never know who will be gone tommorow...


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Re: Funerals bring my family together - August 5th 2009, 06:08 AM

it's the same with my family. my mum always says that we only ever see eachother at weddings and funerals. it's kinda sad though, well at least i think so because when someone dies it makes you want to stay in contact with all your family members more, but my family always just ends up drifting apart.


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Re: Funerals bring my family together - August 6th 2009, 01:01 AM

It's the same for a lot of families, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's good to take some time out to spend with each other and reminisce about old times and catch up on what's going on in everyone's lives. It's sad that most families don't get together during good times, but that's just the way society is now, people are always busy and usually don't think to make time until something's gone wrong. I know that's how my family is, and most others that I know.


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Re: Funerals bring my family together - August 6th 2009, 05:53 PM

The only opportunity i've had to meet up with my dad's side of the family is when my dad's brother died and it was his funeral (but in the end I couldn't go because of an A level resit on the same day) so I think it's the same for everybody.




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Re: Funerals bring my family together - August 6th 2009, 11:27 PM

My dad's family does that too, & it bothers me as well. My dad's side of the family is two-faced as it is, but it's just sad that funerals have to make them start being nice again and pretending like they care for us. Then, a few weeks after that they turn back to their same old ways. It's confusing. It's happened countless times w/ my family. I didn't know everybody else's family did this, it makes me feel a little better.


   
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Re: Funerals bring my family together - August 8th 2009, 09:35 AM

My family are like that too, we only see each other at certain times in the year, its sad really. Everyone should see each other more, prehaps you could bring it up?


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Re: Funerals bring my family together - August 10th 2009, 07:22 PM

I don't think it's all that unusual. It's a bit sad, in the sense that it would be lovely if families were more connected "just because" and not always due to significant events, but it certainly isn't strange.

I mean, you ever notice how (at least in some places) everyone brings food to the family after a funeral or viewing? It's kind of weird but not entirely. When you think about it, the act of communion (not in a spiritual sense, but rather simply the shared act of doing something together, in many cases eating) brings people together. It is most comforting, often, to commune with loved ones rather than alone. We connect with one another over a shared moment (dinner, lunch, whatever).



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