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Death and Grieving Coping with loss is difficult at any age, but you are not alone during this difficult time. Reach out to other users in this forum.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
CookieCrumbs Offline
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Name: Anne
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Location: Third Rock from the Sun

Posts: 18
Join Date: December 31st 2009

Miss him so damn bad - April 18th 2010, 03:11 AM

I don't really like Miley Cyrus music, but I heard *her new song 'When I Look At You'.
And it's like oh god, it makes me want to die. I'm crying so hard.*
I lost my friend seven months, three days ago. And that song made me feel like I could just reach out and touch him.
Everytime I close my eyes, I see his face in my head.

I could hold myself together for the first six months, and that was hard, but I just kept thinking that he was gonna walk around a corner. That I was gonna wake up tomorrow next to him, and this was all a dream.
It took me six months to realize that he really was gone.
Gone forever.
And I can't fix it
I can't save him
I can't help him
and all I want to do now is die. now I just keep falling apart. And everytime I cry all I can see are his *beautiful, beautiful, blue eyes.
I was in the kitchen earlier, and I started thinking about him, and I hardly slept last night, waking up between every dream, *and I leaned on the wall and slipped down to the floor and started crying.

'Everybody needs inspiration*
Everybody needs a song
A beautiful melody
When the nights are long
Cause there no garuntee*
That this life is easy

Yah when my life*
Is falling apart
And there's no light
To break up the dark
That's when I
Oh I
I look at you
When the waves are
Flooding the shore
And I can't
Find my way home anymore
That's when I
Oh I
I look at you

When I look at you
I see forgiveness
I see the truth'**


Even if I say
It'll be alright
Still I hear you say
You want to end your life
Now and again we try
To just stay alive
Maybe we'll turn it all around
'Cause it's not too late
It's never too late
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Apollo Offline
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Name: Apollo
Age: 28
Gender: Male
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow. =)

Posts: 316
Blog Entries: 25
Join Date: February 26th 2010

Re: Miss him so damn bad - April 18th 2010, 07:53 PM

Hello, Anne.

I am truly sorry you have to to go through this. It sounds like you were close to him, and that makes it even harder.

One part you wrote really made me think.

". . . but I just kept thinking that he was gonna walk around the corner. That I was going to wake up tomorrow next to him, and that this was all a dream."

I want you to know that those feelings are completely natural. You are grieving, and that can take a long time to go away. I mean, it may never completely go, but it'll get better. You aren't alone either, most people feel the way you do now after they lose somebody they love. You just need some time to think and find ways to cope with these feelings. Do you think it would help if you talked to somebody? I'm talking about a friend, family member, a school counselor, a therapist, or somebody else you trust. That doesn't mean you're crazy, by any means, it just means that you need to talk these feelings out. Talking might help you feel better. I also understand why you would want to die, but I think your friend would have wanted you to continue living a full and happy life. It's not your time. And, well... Death is an extremely hard thing to deal with, and nobody should go through it alone.

If you need somebody to talk to, feel free to PM me.

Please take care.

Always feel free to contact me.
<3 |.YOU ARE LOVED.| <3


You may think the world is better off without you...
The truth:
The world isn't
good enough without you.

  (#3 (permalink)) Old
kim700 Offline
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Age: 29

Posts: 26
Join Date: February 26th 2010

Re: Miss him so damn bad - May 1st 2010, 08:29 AM

death is a difficult thing to deal with,and i know it can hurt so bad..that you may feel like you need to die....but your friend wouldn't want you to die also. I'm sure your friend would like you to remember the happy times you shared together.The most important thing is to let all your pain and frustrations out. You can go somewhere off in private and cry as long as you need to.Everything that you feel is natural and..it will all get better in time. You need to just hold on and pray..most importantly talk about your feelings if you need to.Just remember that he is in heaven..They say heaven is the most beautiful place.One day we will all see each other again.I know you miss him..but you will see each other again.. then it will be just like old times but even better. I hope things get better for you!! continue to pray..and you will also be in my prayers.
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Clouds. Offline
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Name: Clouds
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Location: Space

Posts: 65
Join Date: June 26th 2009

Re: Miss him so damn bad - May 4th 2010, 12:30 AM

I am sorry to hear about your loss if sounded like you were really close friends so it must be so hard for you right now

I lost my mum and my nana so I know how hard it is to lose someone you truly love & there is no time limit on grief- it may never fully go away. But- it does get easier over time, I promise you that much.

I know right now it seems as though you want to die, but you've got to be strong for yourself and for you friend. Honour his death and stay strong even though I know it feels as though you can't go on at the moment- its prefectly normal to feel that way.

You say that it's only been just over 7 months so it's perfectly normal to still be grieving about this. Try talking about your feelings with another friend/ family member maybe to try and get your feelings out- don't bottle them up. Maybe try writing your feelings down too, that helped me. Even try talking to him (I know that sounds crazy and stupid maybe) but when my nana died my bf pretended to call her up and I would talk to her and tell her how much I loved her & I believe she was listening.

I hope things get easier over time. PM me anytime if you want to talk about things because I've been there myself & I know talking about it to others helped me move on with my life a lot.


~Happy to help *
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