I don't know how to feel...

[Floriferous]

On Monday I found out that my grandpa on my mom's side died July of 2010. My mom had to find this out by doing a Google search of her dad.
I never even met him, so I don't even know how I should feel right now. I'm just going to explain why since it would make a lot more sense that way. Also, keep in mind I JUST learned all of what I'm telling you on Monday, never did I hear it before.
Before I was born, heck, before my mom even met my dad, my mom's dad moved to Australia and lost contact with my mom's side of the family.My mom sent him a wedding invite, but he never responded. Then when I was born she called him and told him about me and my brother. All that he said was something along the lines of, "Oh, whatever," and then he hung up.
The thing is, I feel like I should have some emotion, like sadness or guilt since I never tried contacting him (But how could I?). But at the same time, I don't want to feel anything since he obviously never wanted to get to know me or my brother.
I searched him after I found out all of this and found out he opened a jewelry shop there. I couldn't find anything else about him though. Part of me at least wants to see him, you know, to have something to remember him by, but I don't know if my mom has pictures of him or not.

I just don't know anymore. This has just been on my mind all week. Like I said, I don't know how I should feel at this point. I WANT to just move on and be done with it since he never cared, but at the same time I feel like I should feel upset.

[Chris.]

I dont think you should be upset at all. You cant force yourself to cry or get emotional about someone you never met, nor never had any connection through. Dont blame yourself for not talking to him or trying; I doubt he would have contacted back and that would have hurt you even more.

I hope you can find some forgivness in yourself for not being upset (I wouldnt be upset either)

Best wishes,
Chris

[Kate*]

Hey Amanda, no one can tell you how you should feel or what you should do because there really isn't a right answer. People grieve and/or deal with death in different ways so whatever you're feeling (or not feeling) is fine. Don't feel bad about the way you react, it's just the way it happens sometimes.