Grandfather passed away

[ac2]

My grandfather passed away a couple days ago. My dad told me while we were driving back home from the bus station (I had just returned from school in another city). I know my grandpa had a peaceful death, surrounded by some of his children. He lived a long life.
I am very saddened by his passing. I was very close to my grandpa as a child. However, I moved away from where he lived to another country at age 6. I saw him again when I was 17. Since then, I've only spoken to him briefly on the phone at holidays, and on his birthday. He has many kids and grandchildren, so I know he left us knowing he was very loved.

However, I'm upset because I feel like I didn't talk to him enough. He loved me so much. I wish I had made it painfully clear that I loved him just the same. I feel like he knows, but it seems like he doesn't because we've spent so many years being so far away.

I've been crying numerous times everyday since I found out.

[Audacious]

Hey there.

I'm sad to hear that you are feeling this way about your grandfather's death. Losing somebody, especially around the holidays is tough. It sounds like the part that is really bugging you is that you didn't speak to him much. I wonder if you have considered the possibility of still being able to speak with him. You can talk to him as much as you want..afterall, he will always be in your heart. You can visit the grave site and sit with him and speak to him. You may also want to write him a letter or draw him a picture. You can write him a letter telling him all the things that you wish you could have told him when he was alive. Something I have found to be helpful for many people is either candle lighting or balloon releasing. You can light a candle in the memory of that person and kind of..talk to the candle. You can also write a little message and put it in a balloon, fill it with helium (or tie the message to the string) and then let it go outside.

Crying is okay. Crying is okay. Crying is okay. I can't say it enough. Crying is soooo unbelievably healthy for you to do ! It actually releases the build up of chemicals that happens when you are feeling badly. Cry as much as you need to, regardless of what anybody might say. It's perfectly normal and acceptable to cry, especially when it's over somebody you loved and who you miss dearly.

Take care, and PM me anytime you need.

[Chris.]

Sorry to hear about the passing. Unfortunately this happens alot with people we love, but just haven't bonded with enough. You need to understand and accept that you cant go back int time - but for now on you can promise to yourself that you will try to be involved in everyones lives that you love.

As Jen said, crying is very healthy and very ok to do.

Like you said, he left knowing he was loved - and that means the world to him.


Best wishes,
Chris

[Total Light Storm]

Wow, this sounds almost exact to what has happened to me...
My grandfather passed away a few days ago too.
I know how you are feeling, I feel similar.
I feel like I should have been there more, I should have seen him more, should have told him I love him more and should have done so much more than I did.
But the thing is, we can't change our grandfather's being gone, but we can change what we think about it. Instead of feeling sad and hurt by there deaths, we can try our best to think about the good times and the fun with them.
Also, I really like the idea of writing a letter or talking to him and knowing that he can hear because he is in your heart.
I hope I have helped and if you need to talk, you can PM me and I will be glad to help.

[Squiggly]

Hey there I am so sorry for the loss of your grandpa I know it can be very hard to deal with when you lose someone you really loved. I lost my grandpa 2 years ago and I was VERY close to him. I also felt like I didn't see him enough and I was really upset with myself for not going with my mother to visit him at the hospital when he was sick. But I can tell you that it get's better and eventually it get's easier to handle and someday remembering him won't be as sad anymore it will just be a happy memory that makes you smile. Try to keep comforting yourself knowing that he was loved and he knew it and that it was a peaceful death.

[Kate*]

My grandpa died this month too, and I've been dealing with some guilt of my own, so I understand what you're going though. Losing someone close to you, or anyone for that matter, is never easy, but I'm sure of three things.

He loved you
He understood
You feeling guilty over that is the last thing he would want