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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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Post Is this considered bullying? - October 20th 2013, 03:24 PM

So, at school, in PE class...there's this one girl, let's call her C, who is, God-forbid, pathetically, painfully, lame. The minute I met her, I hated her. She's terribly socially awkward. She's always breaking the first law of social conduct...Thou shalt never cross thy arms in fronteth of your brethren, for it portrays you as closed off to thy universe.
I don't even care if I used those words right, that girl shuts absolutely everyone out, rolls her eyes at everyone, pretends that she's in a 'group' by standing ten feet away and laughing at their jokes, she always has this mean expression on her face, and she glares at everyone.

Now let's backtrack a bit... It's the third week of the school year, there have already been groups made. Now let's see where I'm at! I'm in that one pathetic, lame little group of girls who everyone avoids and makes fun of. I only like one other girl and her breath smells. The other three girls are annoying, nerdy, or boring. I already knew the annoying one enough to know that i did NOT like her, but I never even gave nerdy and boring a chance. Why? Because I can't stand most girls. They're so bitchy, everything they do revolves around themselves. Drama-queens, as I like to call them. Just waiting to drop their stupid drama bombs. This whole year, all I wanted was to hang out with the guys and be able to talk about skateboarding, electric guitars, football, baseball, Xbox 360, PS3, and ACTUALLY be able to make a sarcastic or teasing comment and not have them run and cry in the girls bathroom. Instead, they'd playfully punch me and mmaybe we could even have a arm wrestle to settle this or a rap battle. YEAH...yeah...
But no. I was stuck with the girls. I even left the group for a few days to find New friends. I'm so glad I didn't leave. The boring girl is now my best friend, and it turns out she's anything but boring. And it turns out, everyone hates the annoying girl!

Which brings us to the now. So, the lame girl's only friend is the annoying girl in my group (that we're trying to get out of the group). My bestie and I love playing football together during PE, but this time some other people joined in. We had a girly girl, just trying to show off for her ex, the annoying girl, who thinks she rocks at football but she can NOT throw the ball to save her life, and the lame girl. OH YEAH, so I think the main reason I don't like the lame girl is because we don't need even more people that I can't handle. One is enough. I know I sound arrogant and jerky, but apparently I am just a stupid jerk, so don't screech at me. So while we were playing, nobody passed the ball to the lame girl. (We were just playing catch around a circle because none of those girls knew the real game.) So when I got the ball, my besty was telling me to 'throw it to the girl in the black.' Also known as C. I pretended not to hear her, and threw it to the girly girl instead. Then the girly girl ignored C as well, and so C and the annoying girl left.
I felt really bad, but I can't stop. It's like when I see her...I just ignore her. I completely block her out and ignore her presence. I know I sound mean, but really, I think I'm showing a bit of kindness, in a way. I have a problem where...when I'm mad, or annoyed, I don't think before I speak. I've gotten in fights that way, and not just verbal fights. I know that if I ever got the chance to talk to her, I'd end up hurting her much more than just ignoring her could.

How do I stop and at least pretend to be nice? I'm a horrible person, I'll admit. I talk about people behind their back and think the worst thoughts about people I hate. But at the end of the day, I know I do it because I hate myself and think those thoughts about me. I hate hate hate myself. Everything I do or say is stupid or embarrassing.
Should I even pretend to be nice to her? I don't want her to like me, but I don't want to hate her. It's just whenever I see her, this fog goes over my brain. I can't think, I just do.

Sorry this is long.
Goodbye.


i don't know what i'm supposed to do
haunted by the ghost of you
   
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Re: Is this considered bullying? - October 21st 2013, 03:00 PM

I wouldn't consider it as bullying, since to be honest, you're only ignoring her, you're not verbally/physically abusing, insulting, etc etc.

But to be straight to the point here, Often theres always one person in your life; who you will meet, that is going to be Strange,

I've often met bullies, and other Weird VERY socially awkward people.

I tend to ask Why they are like that? whats their Story as to say.


Everyone has a reason for the way they act; that reason is a story and that story could be heart breaking.

My personal opinion is to Be nice to her, she'll open up to you more, in her heart she could be the sweetest girl Ever, who'd make an AWESOME friend, but you wont find out until you get closer to her.

This is only going off my personal experience, since there was this teenager slightly younger than me, who was saying mean things to me and stuff, threatening me, kind of like a bully.

I let it pass, but until one day i lost my temper and retaliated and basically made him really really upset. I felt really bad, and i knew the reason Why he was such an arse, i won't go into detail but it was a sad story, and i opened up to him as a friend, (since he had no friends, he was just a bully) And we became good friends, i helped him alot too. He had alot of issues with his life that he trusted me to help him with. He became very kind too. Helping me alot in my hours of need, i haven't seen him in a while, but he was a really good person, and he is no longer a bully, last time i checked he had a descent social group of nice friends.


All that basically means You can't judge a person until you know what they've been through; and what they are like on the inside.
   
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Re: Is this considered bullying? - October 21st 2013, 03:58 PM

I think at some point in life we all meet someone who we can't stand and if it's someone that you attend school with and see on regular basis, it is best to play nice even if you don't want to because it wouldn't be fair on her. This doesn't mean that you need to be a friend to her if you don't want to, but at least smiling at her or including her in your games would be enough. I know it might be hard if you dislike her so much you can't help but ignore her but you have to think about how you'd feel if you were consistently ignored by the people you hung out with at school, having been in a similar situation it really isn't nice.
   
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