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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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harassment on a moving train. - July 19th 2015, 04:06 AM

I've had several experiences, and still don't know what to do.

Today there was a pretty big incident, I'm not sure I'm ready to go into detail.

What to do if you are being harassed and witnessing several other people being harassed by a group of about 5 muscular guys? And it is on a moving crowded train. I feel like I went into space out mode so clearly that wasn't a good response because they're much stronger than I am and could have seriously injured me or someone else.
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Re: harassment on a moving train. - July 19th 2015, 01:24 PM

Well, if it's you being harassed you should ask for help. It may not seem like it, but many people actually want to help and feel for you, but they are to scared to actually do something.
If you ask them though, most won't ignore you, because they are even more scared not to help and be judged by the other people on the train. Peer pressure at it's finest^^
The thing with asking for help is, that you have ask someone specific. Not just ask "Can somebody help me", because then everybody will be like , well someone else can help her, it doesn't have to be me.
So look around for someone (preferably a man) and walk up to them and ask them to help you. Or if you can't walk away, try to catch their eye and ask them.

Appart from asking for help you can also try to leave and go somewhere else in the train. At least if that's possible.

If neither is possible I actually think that spacing out is not the worst thing to do. Sure, they could hurt you, but if you don't react to them, they might just leave and go to someone else. Also I think (or at least hope) that they wouldn't seriously hurt someone in a crowded train. There are to many witnesses after all.

Also, with groups like these it's always important to remember that they mostly actually don't want to seriously harm someone. It gives them the feeling of power and controll if they scare other people. They are bullys and as long as they don't feel threatend or challended by you they shouldn't actually hurt you.

I hope there is something usefull in there.
Be careful

It's ok to give in to an urge or make a mistake. You are only human and we all have our flaws. We all have our weak moments and we all make mistakes. Thats what makes us human.
Thats what makes us unique and beautiful

Courage isn't always a loud roar. Sometimes it is a quiet whisper at the end of a day saying: Tomorrow I will try it again!

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Re: harassment on a moving train. - July 19th 2015, 02:18 PM

Hi Susan,

As the person above me said, it's important to ask for help as maybe people didn't realise. I'm not sure what your train system is like in your country but in the UK there are police based at most stations. If this happens again you can get off the train at the next stop and speak to the police or station work.

If you feel in danger of your safety you could also take precautions such as having pepper spray, always carrying a mobile phone and travelling with others if possible.

I hope this helps, I'm here if you need to talk.

I'm here if anyone wants to talk, I'm always here. Feel free to VM or PM me
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Re: harassment on a moving train. - July 20th 2015, 01:27 AM

I'm pondering why they messed with you to begin with?
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Re: harassment on a moving train. - July 20th 2015, 01:41 AM

Thanks for the responses.
They weren't messing with me that much. There were three passengers and those 5 guys mostly intersctibf with each other. I happen to be standing nearby without much room to go anywhere else and we were crossing a bridge that time so it took a while for the train to stop. There's this red button and says to press it for help. I was tempted to press it but didn't know what would happen. The three people were mostly doingwell with defending themselves and each other. I got so many what ifs in my head later on but I guess I was seeing this much dramatic than it really was. The only part that was personal was this small segment that wasnt the main thing and was overlooked. It was just a matter of being yelled at to move and trying to explain there's no room.

In NYC there's this underground subway dance culture. Well this group of 5 guys wanted to do a performance but in order to do that they needed space. They yelled, threatened, spit at, pushed, and humiliated these three people on video recording. Then this one lady took a picture and they found out and were threatening to beat her up if she didn't delete the picture but she said she was going to report them for harassing passengers and therefore needs the picture. So it was mostly 4 people with side comments to random people such as myself. I guess just to take out the frustration on the rest of the train cart. They threatened to beat everyone in the proximity, got in our faces and such.

I think technically if we all rearranged ourselves there would have been enough room to swing on the poles and do the performance. I get that they are dedicated to this and this is their form of income. I think those three people refused to move whereas some of us didn't have space. It got confusing.

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