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Peer Pressure and Bullying Social pressure can take many different forms, including intimidation, bullying and even physical attacks. If you feel you could be a victim or perpetrator (who wishes to stop) of bullying, talk about it here.

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Witch Hunt at school - November 15th 2015, 02:10 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of peer pressure or bullying, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

At school we have a program known as "Link Crew" in which juniors and seniors are accepted to be mentors to about 10 freshmen which they are assigned to. To get into Link Crew at my school is a rather big process; you must apply, and only 80 of the 200 or so who apply are accepted as Link Crew leaders. Furthermore, our advisors (I'll call them "B" and "M") take Link Crew very seriously. While students you are Link Crew leaders don't necessarily have to have the greatest GPA, they must be respectful students. People have been kicked out of Link Crew for swearing at teachers and for getting into trouble multiple times.

This year, my bully (let's call her Amy), was accepted to be a Link Crew leader. As was I; this was my second year as a LC leader as I was one my junior year (last year). She wasn't accepted junior year, and would tell me that I only got in because I had B as a teacher. This really hurt, amongst the other things she told me to consistently bring me down. But this year, she was accepted.

One of the freshmen in my group; let's call her K, is dating another freshmen boy. They're really cute together, but over the past few months a couple people would take pictures of them on snapchat and title it "white trash couple". A few days ago, I reported it to B, as I noticed Amy had posted a picture of them and titled it "white trash couple progressing". My intention was not to get anyone in trouble; I wanted B and M to address the Link Crew group as a whole and warn that if it happened again, people would be in serious trouble. I messaged B on Facebook, and she instantly said that she needed names. Amy's was the only one I could remember, and I told B that I would hate if Amy got kicked out of LC because of this.

Of course, she did. Furthermore, the advisor of our school's National Honor Society found out and removed Amy from her position as president. The advisor takes NHS extremely seriously, and did not think her action was appropriate for being the "face" of our schools NHS.

She's extremely upset, and there's a literal witch hunt at school to figure out who "snitched" as peers so call it. Most people believe that it was me, as some know that Amy and I aren't friends, and that they know that the freshman girl in the couple was one of my freshmen. Instead of being outraged over the fact that freshmen were being bullied over snapchat though, people (who've even been bullied themselves) keep saying that "It was just a joke" and defending Amy and her action. Furthermore, one boy even said "if I f****** find out who snitched, I'm gonna f****** beat their a**". Some people are neutral about the situation, saying that it wasn't right Amy did that but she shouldn't have been kicked out of anything, or that whoever snitched shouldn't have done that. Personally, I think Amy had what was coming to her. Furthermore, I'd feel bad for her if she was actually sorry for what she did, but she's not, and has said so multiple times, saying "I don't even know them, why should I have to apologize?" (why are you even taking pictures of them if you don't even know who they are? furthermore that is just plain rude). B is making Amy apologize to the freshmen, who were both informed about what happened. Amy is claiming that B and M ruined her life, and there's even a mini campaign at school "#justiceforamy".

Overall, I'm appalled by the fact more people have sympathy for Amy, and none for the freshmen. People at school have come up to me asking if it was me who had "snitched" (lol yeah it was me). I've lied, as B and M have told me that "I already told the truth. I don't owe it to anyone else". I don't know why people think that I would tell them it was me anyways, I'm not stupid; I know that they'd just tell Amy.

I'm already feeling shunned at school. I've talked to B and M about this and they keep assuring me that I did the right thing; and I believe that I did. I just hate how everyone is responding to this situation.

Furthermore, when B was deciding how to punish Amy, she asked fellow teachers if this was something that Amy would do. They all said "yep, that sounds like Amy".

I'm not really looking for advice. I just want to hear responses to this situation and if anyone else has experienced this before. No one knows I told except for my parents, brother, his girlfriend, and B and M. This is my senior year, and I don't want the school to end up hating me and shunning for doing the right thing.


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Re: Witch Hunt at school - November 15th 2015, 02:49 AM

I know you know this already, but you did the right thing, you aren't responsible for Amy's consequences. The advisers didn't ruin her life, she made a choice and lost privileges because of it. People are going to have opinions about things, and they have a right to them, even if they don't know the whole situation. You don't owe anyone else an explanation. The good thing about it being your senior year is that you will be graduating soon and can put this behind you. Things happen fast in high school, people will move on to something else eventually and probably forget all about this. I know this feels like a huge deal right now, but it's amazing how quickly these things go away once high school is over.


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Re: Witch Hunt at school - November 15th 2015, 04:45 AM

I agree with Katie. You did the right thing. Amy is responsible for her own actions and no one hurt her except herself. That was completely her doing. I, too, am confused about how people are supporting Amy and not the freshmen. Like Katie said, you don't owe anyone an explanation. Hopefully something new will take the spotlight and allow this to blow over.


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Re: Witch Hunt at school - November 15th 2015, 11:05 PM

I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Seems like kids at your school are getting angry at the wrong person. You did the right thing. I cannot stress that enough.
I hope things go okay from here. Keep reaching out to advisors. I can imagine you're feeling alone in a school environment like this. Know there are people who believe you and support you
   
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Re: Witch Hunt at school - November 18th 2015, 06:53 PM

Wow, that Amy is a b*. Honestly you did the right thing and if anything it's something to be proud about, because you saved those two kids from a horrible situation. I've been there once and noone stuck up to me or reported it to the teachers and it was awfull.
It's amazing that there are people like you out there who still do what's right and not give in to peer pressure.
Sadly, I think that's what's happening now. It's so easy to point the finger at someone who activly did something instead of just standing by.
From my experience there isn't anything that can be done about it. People will always point and always gang up on others. Hopefully there will be some new gossip soon and the whole thing will blow over.


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Re: Witch Hunt at school - November 19th 2015, 04:39 AM

I agree with the above posters. Amy put herself in the position she's in all by herself. She didn't have to resort to bullying behavior and spread rudeness regarding the couple, but she did. Whereas if she had just refrained from taking any action where the main purpose is to personally hurt two people, she could have remained a leader in the program. I just hope this experience is a learning experience for her in teaching her that treating others badly is never a good course of action. Even if she doesn't see that at this point in time. Either way, bullies shouldn't be allowed to continue to put others down without any consequences.

As for people wanting to know who told on Amy, I know it may be hard but know that it doesn't concern them so you have no obligation to answer their question.

Susan is right, it seems like everyone is directing their anger towards the right person. I'm proud of you for sticking up for the couple, Mads. You did the right thing and I'd hope you would do the same thing again if put in that position again. I am sure eventually all this will go away but in the meantime, don't be afraid to seek support here and from those who can see that you've done the right thing because it must be hard when it feels like most of the students are against you.

Keep it up, Mads. It must have been difficult speaking up but you did and that shows character. Stay strong and take care.
   
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Re: Witch Hunt at school - November 22nd 2015, 01:31 PM

Agreed with your actions. As a leader, she should not have done that to juniors who were supposed to look up to her. Furthermore from your post above, it seems that she already have a following which is why they are sticking up for her. Anyone with an objective view would be agreeable to your actions. Don't worry about being shunned, this will pass before you know it.
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