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Anxiety This forum is for seeking advice on anxiety and stress related issues.

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Sixella Offline
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I don't know what's wrong with me. - August 21st 2010, 07:41 PM

Everytime plans with my boyfriend dont work out I get extremely angry and anxiouse. I slam doors, throw things, punch things ext..I end up screaming, swearing and hyperventilating. This also happens when he changes things in the plans.

Say we made plans to go to my house. But then he all of a sudden last minute wants to go to his house. Well I end up getting really tense. I dont feel like talking to him and i'll even get nasty.

I dont know why I make such a big deal. We hang out a decent amount but I can't help but feel devistated when things change.

Does anyone else get this?
   
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Re: I don't know what's wrong with me. - August 21st 2010, 09:36 PM

I haven't had this happen to me before but changes are difficult for a lot of people. I think you should talk to your boyfriend and let him know change is hard so you want to make plans and stick to them. Also, you should reach out to some adults in your life so they might be able help you. I know it may seem embarassing but it'll be worth it in the end. Let me know if you need anything.


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Re: I don't know what's wrong with me. - August 26th 2010, 01:30 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alessa (>**)> View Post
I haven't had this happen to me before but changes are difficult for a lot of people. I think you should talk to your boyfriend and let him know change is hard so you want to make plans and stick to them. Also, you should reach out to some adults in your life so they might be able help you. I know it may seem embarassing but it'll be worth it in the end. Let me know if you need anything.
I agree with Alessa. Talking to your boyfriend will definitely help smooth things over. I know that when I was younger my girlfriends would do the same thing and change plans on me (or worse: cancel or be late). That had a similar effect. Communication definitely helped along the way.

I think it's rooted not just in the change, as I am guessing there are things in your life will often change that does not invoke this response. It could potentially be that you had your mind set on your plans. Changing your plans after you've invested a lot of mental energy in them is difficult.

If those changes put you in a mood, recognize it. Altering a mood is much more difficult than changing your thoughts. If you've communicated this to your boyfriend he will either avoid change when he can or make things easier for you if a change in plans is necessary.
   
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