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sarahjjj Offline
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Unhappy Should I audition? Am I selfish if I don't? - September 27th 2018, 02:03 AM

My school’s fall drama auditions are tomorrow. I dislike the club, I dislike the people in the club, I dislike the director, but I love acting.

The people in the club and I just don’t click, many of them are very nice, but our personalities just do not work well together. I have a very shy, type “B” personality, which I think can come off as cold, distant, and pretentious to the other kids who typically have a type “A” personality, which makes it very hard for me to make friends in the club, besides one or two close friendships.

The director is crazy. Last year, she kicked a kid out of the show because he had to take SATs during tech week. When her friends spoke up about it, she canceled our spring show a month before the performance. We did not rehearse for over two weeks before administration forced her to go forward with the show, but we were so far behind it turned out really bad. Additionally, she often yells and even cursed at me when I messed up a line. (May I add, it was tech week and my grandfather had passed the night before, which she was aware of, and we she had refused to run this scene before.)

I love acting, and I know I sound like I’m complaining, but I don’t think I can deal with this anymore. I’m involved in eight other clubs, have leadership positions in four of them, and am taking five AP level classes this year while maintaining a 4.0 average, so quitting the drama club will not necessarily affect my college applications. It's hard because my mom is very involved with the drama club as well. I know she has been going through some mental health issues and getting to go to the parent meetings with other mothers is good for her, so I feel like I’m being selfish if I quit.

Last edited by Celyn; September 27th 2018 at 11:14 AM. Reason: Moving to Education and Careers :)
   
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Celyn Offline
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Re: Should I audition? Am I selfish if I don't? - September 27th 2018, 11:36 AM

I moved your thread over to Education and Careers as I thought it fit a bit better and you might get more help here.

It sounds annoying for you to love acting and yet not get on with the people in the club or the director. You mention that you are shy and that the other people aren't, so it's hard for you to make friends there. I'm wondering if the other people treat you okay in general? Unfortunately, some people make assumptions about shy people but they shouldn't treat you any differently.

As for the director, it does seem unfair of her to kick people out or cancel shows. And she shouldn't have cursed at you for messing up a line, especially if she was aware of your grandfather passing away the night before.

You aren't complaining. But it's understandable that with all the other things you are involved in, even though you love acting, that you'd feel like not auditioning or dropping out instead. I'm sorry to hear about your mom's mental health issues. It does sound like going to the meetings with other mothers is good for her, but that shouldn't be a reason for you to keep going if you really don't want to. It won't make you selfish if you quit at all. Maybe your mom can carry on being involved in the drama club, even if you dropped out? Or maybe there are other drama clubs outside of school that both you and your mom could get involved in?

Only you can decide whether to audition or not, or whether to drop out or not. Whatever you decide to do, you are doing what's best for you


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Re: Should I audition? Am I selfish if I don't? - September 27th 2018, 02:29 PM

There's always the option for community theater.
Talk to your mom about this. I'm sure she will understand. Especially if your that busy.
I don't think you're complaining, as your teacher shouldn't treat you or the class this way.
You should definitely join community theater though, once you are able to. I've heard from many people its ima nice conference booster.

I hope you can settle this conflict.



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Re: Should I audition? Am I selfish if I don't? - September 27th 2018, 04:06 PM

I don't think you should audition. This is just my opinion.

You don't seem to want to. The director is a nasty piece of work who's proven that she's willing to throw a hissy fit and cancel shit and treat children like crap just cause, idk, she didn't get her way or is in a bad mood or whatever, and you don't even like the other people. Even if the issue is that you feel insecure and think they don't like you, that might not be true, they might like you just fine but you aren't exactly saying "I love them but feel like it's not reciprocated" it doesn't seem like you care about them either way.

You don't need the play to boost your chances of getting into college, and even if you did there are other pathways for you to pursue, such as community theatre, or even other non-acting related things.

If you love acting but don't audition and don't go with community theatre, take the added free time as an opportunity to start a blog or something -- research stuff and write about it. Like you could look up the "real" history behind Alexander Hamilton and how it compares to Hamilton the musical, you could research different acting styles (like there is being classically trained, being a good improve person etc) and write about how one trains for different methods, the pros and cons, how it affects what roles people go for etc. Things like blogs, if your name is attached to it, can also be helpful for your future as it's a way to demonstrate your engagement in something, in this case, acting/theatre.
   
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Exclamation Re: Should I audition? Am I selfish if I don't? - September 28th 2018, 04:35 AM

UPDATE: I auditioned, but told my mom how I felt after the fact. She reacted pretty much how I expected, telling me that I was being unfair and embarrassing her and that I was being rude to her. She then emailed my director to tell her that I "Wasted her time and should not be considered for any future shows."

Great.

At least I don't have to do it anymore
   
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Celyn Offline
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Re: Should I audition? Am I selfish if I don't? - September 28th 2018, 12:56 PM

Sorry to hear how your mom reacted after you told her how you felt. Though it's understandable she may have felt auditioning wasn't a good move if you didn't really want to do it, you weren't being unfair or being embarrassing to her.

It is good that you opened up to your mom about how you felt regarding the drama club though, and even if it didn't go as planned, it looks like you won't have to be auditioning anymore either!


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